Are We Over-Scheduling Our Kids?

A Complete Summary of the Modern Indian Parent Podcast Episode on Baby & Toddler Classes
(With Child Nutritionist Sanchita Daswani & Pediatric Sleep Consultant Rinie Gupta)

If you don’t have 40 minutes to listen, here’s everything that was discussed in detail, no fluff, no bullet symbols, just honest conversation turned into an easy read (approximately 1000 words).

The Pressure Starts at Six Months – But Is It Necessary?

As soon as a baby hits six months, the flood of classes begins: sensory play, messy craft, music, baby gym, swimming, the list is endless. Both hosts felt this pressure. Sanchita wishes she had started a movement-based class like My Gym at six months because in high-rise cities (Hong Kong, Singapore, Mumbai) babies simply don’t get enough floor space or safe outdoor time to practise crawling, cruising and walking. Rinie, on the other hand, tried a messy-play craft class at eight months, travelled 45 minutes each way, paid the equivalent of 30 dollars per session and after five classes realised she could recreate everything at home for free. She dropped out and never looked back.

First Child vs Second Child Reality Check

Every parent of two or more children says the exact same thing: with the first child we overdid everything and signed them up for every possible class at the youngest possible age. With the second child we barely did anything until four or five years and saw absolutely no difference in development. This came up repeatedly in the conversation as proof that early enrichment is largely parent-driven rather than child-needed.

Sleep and Meals Are Non-Negotiable

This was the strongest united stance. No class is worth compromising naps, meals or bedtime. Rinie shared a client story of a 14-month-old whose schedule was packed with classes, including one that fell right in the middle of morning nap time. She advised the mother to drop several classes immediately because an overtired, hungry child gains nothing from any structured activity.

Free Play Beats Structured Classes Almost Every Time

Both moms repeatedly emphasised free play over scheduled classes, especially before age five or six. They referenced a UNICEF report that strongly recommends emphasising free play until at least age six for optimal motor and brain development. Another 2024 study was mentioned showing that children only start displaying genuine curiosity about peers and real social interest around four to five years of age. Until then, parallel play (doing their own thing next to others) is perfectly normal and healthy. Ninety minutes of daily outdoor play was highlighted as more beneficial for brain development than any indoor structured class.

Your Child’s Temperament Changes Everything

One of the most valuable parts of the discussion was about temperament. There are three broad categories: easy-going children who adapt quickly, slow-to-warm children who need weeks or months to feel comfortable, and highly sensitive children who can shut down completely in overstimulating group settings. Rinie shared how her daughter took forever to trust a swim coach but learned to swim confidently once her parents took over the lessons on lazy Sunday mornings because the child inherently trusts mom and dad.

Life Skills Like Swimming – Force Early or Wait?

Sanchita tried formal swimming lessons with her twins and they hated it. This summer she simply let them splash with floats in the pool. One day her son removed the floats himself and started swimming. The conclusion: expose children to life skills, give them a fair few sessions, but if there are tears every week it is perfectly fine to pause and retry later when they actually enjoy it.

Rujuta Diwekar’s Simple Guideline for Ages 5 and Above

Sanchita loves celebrity nutritionist Rujuta Diwekar’s practical formula for children above five: one activity that works on balance and movement (cycling, skating, gymnastics, dance, any sport), one classical art form (instrument or classical dance because music is therapeutic), and at least ninety minutes of daily active free play which can include household chores like carrying plates, making the bed or climbing stairs. The goal is simply to keep children moving in a sedentary world.

Online Classes – The Surprisingly Honest Verdict

Sanchita eventually started online math and Chinese classes for her seven-year-old twins (India-based tutors, much cheaper than physical centres). The results were impressive: her daughter now confidently counts money and both children suddenly speak Mandarin sentences after years of nothing. However, there is a clear downside: on online-class days they move far less, are less tired and take longer to fall asleep compared to days with dance or tennis. Her solution is no television on online-class days and extra rough-and-tumble play before bed.

Over-Scheduled Kids and the Loss of Imagination

A big concern raised was children who have a class every single day and then stare blankly on a free Saturday because they never learned how to entertain themselves. They can follow Lego instructions perfectly but freeze when given open-ended magnet tiles because no one is telling them what to make. Reducing classes dramatically gave Sanchita’s children back the ability to read for two hours straight or create elaborate doll stories.

When to Push and When to Let Go

Both moms agree: expose children properly (at least a couple of months of consistent sessions) so they truly understand the activity, but once they say they are done, trust them. Children need to be happy walking into an activity. Forcing excellence rarely works at this age.

Final Message – Drop the Mom Guilt

The episode ended on a beautiful note. Rinie pointed out that we never say “hands-on mom” the way we say “hands-on dad” because being hands-on is the default setting of motherhood, like saying wet water. Outsourcing something you cannot teach yourself (Chinese, advanced math, ballet technique) is not selfish, it is smart parenting. Both hosts reminded every listener that there is no single right answer, but focusing on sleep, meals, free movement and joy will always beat an over-packed schedule.

In short: under two years keep it minimal and movement-focused if needed, two to four years let preschool and free play do the heavy lifting, four or five years onward explore genuine interests with one balance activity, one classical art and ninety minutes of daily active play. And most importantly, trust yourself, you are doing better than you think.

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Are you tired of mealtime battles that leave you stressed and your toddler in tears? In this episode of the Modern Indian Parent Podcast, host Sanchita Daswani, a child nutritionist, teams up with Rinie Gupta, a pediatric sleep consultant, to reframe those food fights as opportunities for connection and growth. Drawing from her own journey with her kids, Sanchita opens up about the pressure she felt to force clean plates—only to find freedom through understanding intuitive eating. This conversation dives deep into why forcing food backfires and lays the foundation for raising kids who eat happily, healthily, and without guilt. Packed with culturally relatable stories and practical strategies, it’s a game-changer for every Indian parent.

Intro and Journey into Intuitive Eating

The episode kicks off with a warm welcome that instantly feels like a chat with friends. Rinie introduces the podcast as a space for redefining parenting in Indian families by owning modern choices. Sanchita shares that intuitive eating is close to her heart—especially for parents who’ve struggled with weight or body image.

They set the stage: this isn’t just about today’s lunch. It’s about setting kids up to make smart food decisions when they’re out on their own. Because one day, they’ll be at birthday parties, school canteens, or college mess halls—and you want them to trust their body, not fear food.

What is Intuitive Eating?

Sanchita defines intuitive eating in simple terms: listening to your body’s hunger cues—how much you need, what you need, and when to stop. She reminds us that everyone is born with this ability. Babies show it perfectly with milk: they ask for it and stop when done.

The problem? Most of us grew up in a volume-driven culture where finishing the plate is more important than listening to our bodies. Rinie adds that many millennial parents struggle with overeating or eating disorders—and these issues are now hitting kids earlier due to content and expectations.

Sanchita emphasizes starting intuitive eating at 6 months with solids—not when they’re 8 or 9. Because forcing a clean plate feels good short-term but leads to harmful long-term consequences like overweight or body image issues.

Practical Steps to Start Intuitive Eating Early:

• Serve small portions and let them signal for more.

• Respect cues like head turns or closed mouths as “done.”

• Avoid praising clean plates—instead celebrate trying new foods.

• Model it yourself by eating slowly and stopping when full.

This builds a foundation of trust in their body from the very first bite.

Why “Finish Your Plate” is a Problem

Rinie points out how often we say “finish” in Indian homes—applauding kids for clean plates or urging “more bites.” But Sanchita explains this implies: your body says stop, but we’re not happy. We’ll do anything—TV, dancing, bribes—to make you eat more.

She stresses that kids are humans with their own appetites. Every baby is different. Forcing them to eat a set amount assumes they need the same nutrition daily—but that’s not true.

How to Shift Away from “Finish Your Plate”:

• Remove the word “finish” from mealtime talk.

• Let them leave food without comment.

• Focus on weekly patterns, not one meal.

• Trust that their body knows what it needs.

This prevents short-term stress and long-term harm.

The Restaurant Analogy Every Parent Needs

Sanchita shares two relatable stories to drive the point home.

First Story: Imagine you’re at a restaurant in Vietnam. The waiter brings a new dish—“It’s excellent! You gotta have it!” Do you gobble it? No. You look, ask what’s in it, watch others, take a bite. Then decide: love it? More? Done?

Now think of your baby. You offer ragi porridge—“It’s yummy! Eat!” But you don’t give them time to feel. You expect them to finish the bowl instantly.

Second Story: You love dal rice. One day, you’re full and leave two bites. The waiter, chef, manager surround you: “You cannot leave until you finish! TV on! Dance!” Would you return? No.

Same with kids. If they leave food—even their favorite—don’t force. Don’t distract. Respect their body.

How to Apply This at Home:

• Give them time to taste and decide.

• Honor “no” without negotiation.

• Avoid distractions like TV or toys.

• Let them leave food—it’s okay.

This turns mealtime into joy, not a battlefield.

What to Do When Child Only Eats 2 Bites?

Rinie asks the big worry: what if they only eat two bites? Sanchita reassures—it’s normal. We cannot expect them to finish three ounces every day. They have their own appetite.

She ties it to the restaurant stories: respect their wishes. Look at totality over the week, not one meal. Pressuring takes away joy and harms long-term.

Step-by-Step Plan When They Stop Early:

• Take the plate away calmly—say “All done?”

• Offer the same food again after 20 minutes.

• If still not eaten, bring the next snack or meal a bit earlier.

• Observe patterns over days, not hours.

• Keep meals balanced so small bites nourish.

This teaches self-regulation and keeps eating positive.

How to Talk to Kids About Food and What It Does to the Body

As kids grow, simple, honest chats about food help them understand why we eat what we eat—without fear or confusion. Sanchita explains sugar gives quick energy but too much causes crashes. Rinie shares how her daughter learned to save halwa for the weekend, showing she grasped that treats are special, not daily. They stress balance and looking at the whole week, not just one meal.

Age-Appropriate Ways to Talk About Food (Based on the Episode):

• For younger kids (around 2–3 years): Keep it playful—“Sugar is for fun zoom when you play, but fruits and veggies help you stay strong and fight off sickness so you don’t get sick.”

• For slightly older kids (4+ years): Help them notice—“How does your tummy feel after sweets?” This teaches them to feel energy dips from too much sugar.

• Teach about carbs as fuel: “Carbs like rice, roti, and dal give slow energy to keep you running and playing all day long—sugar is fast but fades quick.”

• Explain protein and calcium simply: “Protein in dal, paneer, eggs, and chicken helps build strong muscles so you can climb and jump. Calcium in milk, curd, and leafy greens makes your bones and teeth super strong—like steel inside!”

• Highlight staying healthy: “Fruits and veggies have special vitamins that act like superheroes to keep germs away and help you feel good.”

• Use the weekend system: Let them save treats like halwa or ice cream for Saturday—“One special treat makes the weekend extra fun!” This builds patience and joy.

• No good/bad labels: Always say “sometimes fun food” vs. “everyday food” so nothing feels forbidden or guilty.

These calm, everyday talks—maybe during a walk or while cooking—turn food into a friend, not a fight. Kids learn to choose balance naturally.

Is It Okay to Be Super Strict About Not Offering Junk and Sugar?

Rinie sees millennial parents over-restricting—complete bans on sugar and junk. Sanchita agrees: till age 2, avoid all sugar and packaged foods. The first thousand days affect long-term growth.

Post 2, it’s okay a few times a week. Look at totality—if home meals are simple, three times (cookie, ice cream) is fine. Hidden sugar in sauces or chips adds up.

Rinie does weekends only—her daughter saved halwa for the treat. Sanchita’s kids asked daily, so she restricted weekdays. Festivals? Be flexible for memories.

Balanced Guidelines for Sugar and Junk:

• Till 2: no sugar or packaged—keep it natural.

• After 2: 3 times a week max if meals are home-cooked.

• Check all foods—sauces, juices count.

• Allow festival sweets, balance other days.

• Assess weekly total, not daily.

This prevents rebellion and builds healthy attitudes.

The Biggest Tip: Focus on Connection

Sanchita’s final advice: when sitting at mealtimes, focus on connection. Mealtimes are stressful because we think “How can I get them to finish?” Shift to “How can I connect?”

Ways to Make Mealtimes Happier:

• Eat together without distractions.

• Play soft music they like.

• Talk, laugh, share the day.

• Involve them—let them stir or serve.

• Keep the mood light—no pressure.

Rinie agrees: make mealtimes happier, and good habits follow naturally. No bribes. No force. Just love.

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Are you tired of toddler tantrums turning your home upside down, leaving you exhausted and unsure of your next move? In this episode of the Modern Indian Parent Podcast, host Sanchita Daswani, a pediatric nutritionist, teams up with Dr. Ishinna B. Sadana, a renowned parenting coach, to reframe those meltdowns as opportunities for connection and growth. Drawing from her own struggles with her twins, Sanchita opens up about the disconnect she felt during those early years, only to find clarity through understanding toddler behavior. This first part of their conversation dives deep into why tantrums happen and lays the foundation for managing them effectively with practical, culturally relevant strategies.

Intro and Journey of Ishinna

The discussion hints at a transformative approach, with Dr. Ishinna suggesting that knowledge can turn chaos into understanding.

“Tantrums are a signal, not a problem to solve,” she shares early on, planting the seed that these outbursts are part of a child’s development rather than a personal failing. This sets an encouraging tone, promising parents tools to build stronger bonds with their little ones.

What Are Tantrums?

Dr. Ishinna dives into the heart of the matter by defining tantrums as behaviors rooted in deep emotions. She explains that these outbursts occur because a toddler’s brain, particularly the prefrontal cortex, is still maturing and unable to regulate intense feelings like helplessness, frustration, or anger.

“Tantrums are behaviors which have a lot of emotions underneath,” she clarifies, inviting parents to look beyond the surface.

This developmental stage, common from ages one to five, means children feel emotions powerfully but lack the verbal or cognitive skills to express them. Sanchita adds a cultural twist, noting how mealtimes in Indian households—often filled with family members urging a child to eat—can amplify these emotions, turning a simple refusal into a full-blown tantrum. Dr. Ishinna expands on this by comparing adult and toddler behavior: adults can mask upset feelings with a smile for guests, thanks to that “filter” in the brain, but toddlers express every emotion raw and unfiltered, whether at home or in a crowded mall.

• Emotional Drivers: Feelings like frustration or powerlessness often trigger tantrums, especially when a child can’t communicate needs.

• Brain Development Gap: The prefrontal cortex, responsible for self-regulation, develops gradually, leaving toddlers reliant on parents to help process emotions.

• A Call for Support: Dr. Ishinna emphasizes viewing tantrums as a cry for assistance, urging parents to shift from punishment to empathy.

This understanding is crucial for Indian parents, where societal pressure might push for quick fixes like scolding. Instead, recognizing tantrums as a natural phase encourages a supportive response.

Game Changing Tip When Child Is Having a Tantrum

One of the episode’s standout moments is Dr. Ishinna’s game-changing tip for handling tantrums in the heat of the moment. She advises parents to physically and emotionally meet their child where they are, offering validation over immediate correction.

“Sit with them, match their energy, and say, ‘I see you’re upset. I’m here,’” she recommends with a soothing tone.

This approach isn’t about stopping the tantrum instantly but about creating a safe space for the child to feel seen. Sanchita connects this to her own experience, recalling how mealtime refusals with her twins escalated until she started validating their feelings, which calmed them down. Dr. Ishinna explains that matching energy—perhaps mirroring their cries with a gentle hum or sitting on the floor with them—helps the child feel understood, turning the outburst into a teaching moment. Over time, this builds trust and emotional security, especially in busy Indian homes where distractions are common.

• Practical Steps: Get down to their eye level, use a calm voice, and avoid rushing to solve the problem.

• Mealtime Application: If a child refuses food, sit with them and say, “I see you don’t want this now,” rather than forcing a bite.

• Long-Term Benefit: Consistent validation fosters a stronger parent-child bond, reducing tantrum frequency as the child learns to express needs.

This tip is a cornerstone for transforming tantrums into opportunities for growth.

How to Handle Screaming Tantrums?

Screaming tantrums can test even the most patient parent, but Dr. Ishinna offers a de-escalation technique that’s both simple and powerful.

“When they scream, don’t shout back. Whisper, ‘I know you’re mad. Let’s breathe together,’” she advises.

The key is to lower the emotional temperature by contrasting the child’s volume with a whisper, encouraging them to follow your lead. Sanchita shares how this worked during family gatherings, where a screaming toddler can draw unwanted attention. Dr. Ishinna suggests pairing the whisper with slow, exaggerated breaths—inhale for four seconds, exhale for four—to guide the child into a calmer state. This method not only stops the scream but also teaches self-regulation, a skill toddlers are just beginning to grasp.

• Execution: Stay physically close but not overpowering; use a soft, steady whisper to shift focus.

• Cultural Context: In public Indian settings like markets, this prevents escalation while respecting social norms.

• Consistency: Practice daily, even outside tantrums, to build a habit of calm breathing.

This strategy empowers parents to handle loud outbursts with confidence.

Why Are So Many Parents Scared of Their Child’s Emotions?

Dr. Ishinna uncovers a deeper reason behind parental fear: it often mirrors their own emotional struggles.

“We’re scared because we weren’t taught to handle emotions ourselves,” she reflects thoughtfully.

In Indian culture, where stoicism is often prized and emotions like crying might be dismissed, parents may feel unequipped to deal with a toddler’s outbursts. Sanchita adds that well-meaning grandparents, offering advice like “Just give them what they want,” can heighten this fear, creating a cycle of stress. Dr. Ishinna notes that this fear stems from a lack of emotional education, where parents were raised to suppress rather than process feelings. Recognizing this personal history allows parents to approach tantrums with curiosity rather than dread.

• Cultural Influence: Traditional Indian parenting might prioritize obedience, making emotional expression seem disruptive.

• Breaking the Cycle: Acknowledging fear helps parents seek tools, like those in this podcast, to support their child.

• Empathy Boost: Understanding your own emotions fosters patience with your toddler’s.

This insight is a critical first step toward managing tantrums effectively.

Why Handling Tantrums Starts with Our Reaction

Dr. Ishinna emphasizes that a parent’s response is the foundation for tantrum management.

“Your reaction is the thermostat. If you stay cool, they learn to regulate,” she says.

A frustrated yell can escalate a tantrum into a power struggle, while a calm pause models self-control. Sanchita shares how, in her busy household, taking a deep breath before responding prevented her twins’ tantrums from spiraling. Dr. Ishinna explains that children are like sponges, absorbing how parents handle stress. By staying composed—perhaps stepping away for a moment if needed—parents teach regulation by example, a vital lesson for emotional intelligence.

• Practical Application: Count to ten or step outside briefly to reset before engaging.

• Indian Household Tip: In joint families, a calm reaction can also model behavior for elders watching.

• Long-Term Impact: Consistent cool-headedness helps toddlers mirror this skill over time.

How to Handle Kids with Violent Tantrums?

Violent tantrums—kicking, hitting, or throwing objects—can be alarming for any parent. Dr. Ishinna approaches this with a balance of safety and compassion, recommending a firm yet loving intervention.

“If they’re hitting, say, ‘I won’t let you hurt me, but I’m here to keep you safe,’” she advises.

The strategy involves gently holding the child or moving them to a safe space, like a padded corner, to prevent harm to themselves or others. Sanchita points out the challenge in Indian homes with limited space, suggesting a soft mat or blanket area as a practical alternative. Dr. Ishinna stresses consistency—repeating the boundary each time—while reassuring the child with a hug or soothing words afterward. This teaches respect for others’ boundaries while reinforcing that love remains constant, even during tough moments.

• Safety First: If the tantrum escalates, guide the child to a soft, enclosed area away from hard objects.

• Physical Support: A gentle hold on their arms or torso can stop hitting, paired with a calm voice.

• Post-Tantrum Care: Offer a cuddle and say, “I love you, let’s try again,” to rebuild trust.

• Cultural Note: In joint families, this can model non-violent discipline for grandparents to observe.

How to Handle Kids Who Whine a Lot?

Whining can wear down even the most patient parent, but Dr. Ishinna sees it as a child’s attempt to communicate. She suggests acknowledging the whine before redirecting to words.

“Say, ‘I hear you’re upset. Can you tell me with words?’ Then offer a choice,” she explains.

For example, if a child whines about not wanting veggies, a parent might say, “I hear you don’t like this. Would you try a bite or pick a fruit instead?” This encourages language development while reducing the whining habit. Sanchita ties this to mealtimes, suggesting Indian parents offer a preferred item (like rice) alongside a new food (like spinach), turning whining into a negotiation. Over time, this builds communication skills and patience.

• Acknowledgment: Validate the feeling first to show the child they’re heard.

• Choice Offering: Provide two acceptable options to empower them (e.g., “Carrot or peas?”).

• Mealtime Hack: Use familiar Indian dishes as leverage to introduce variety gradually.

• Consistency: Repeat this daily to shift whining to verbal requests.

How to Handle Bedtime Refusals?

Bedtime refusals are a common battleground for parents. Dr. Ishinna advocates for a predictable routine to ease transitions.

“Start with a bath, then a story, and dim lights. Say, ‘Night-night,’” she suggests.

This sequence signals the end of the day, helping the child wind down. Sanchita shares how, after tough days, this routine became her saving grace with her twins, reducing resistance. Dr. Ishinna adds that avoiding overstimulation—like loud play or screens 30 minutes before bed—sets the stage for sleep. In Indian homes, where evenings might involve family chatter, parents can create a quiet corner with a lamp and storybook to reinforce the routine.

• Routine Elements: Begin with a warm bath, followed by a 5–10 minute story, and end with dimming lights.

• Signal Use: The “Night-night” phrase becomes a cue the child learns to associate with sleep.

• Avoid Triggers: Limit TV or phone time; opt for lullabies or soft toys instead.

• Adaptation: If grandparents are around, involve them in reading to maintain the flow.

How to Help Navigate Strong-Willed Children?

Strong-willed children often challenge authority, but Dr. Ishinna sees this as a strength to harness with choices.

“Give them two choices you’re okay with, like ‘Red shirt or blue?’” she recommends.

This gives the child a sense of control while keeping the parent in charge. Sanchita notes this works well for mealtime decisions in Indian families, where a child might refuse dal but accept it if given a choice between dal or curd rice. Dr. Ishinna explains that offering options prevents power struggles, teaching decision-making skills. Consistency is key—always provide choices within safe limits.

• Choice Structure: Limit to two options (e.g., “Apple slices or banana?”) to avoid overwhelm.

• Mealtime Example: “Would you like rice with veggies or a small dosa?” keeps nutrition on track.

• Positive Reinforcement: Praise their choice to encourage cooperation.

• Long-Term Growth: Builds autonomy, a trait of emotionally intelligent kids.

Child Doesn’t Want to Go to Class, How to Handle This

School resistance can signal anxiety or fatigue. Dr. Ishinna advises validating the child’s feelings before encouraging action.

“Say, ‘I know it’s hard, but I’m here,’ then gently encourage,” she advises.

For instance, if a child cries about school, a parent might sit with them, acknowledge the fear, and say, “I know it’s tough to leave home, but I’ll be here when you’re back—let’s get your bag ready together.” Sanchita suggests building excitement by talking about a favorite teacher or friend the night before. Preparation, like packing a snack, can reduce morning stress.

• Validation Step: Spend 2–3 minutes acknowledging their emotions without rushing.

• Encouragement: Use a cheerful tone and involve them in small tasks like choosing a water bottle.

• Preparation: Discuss the day’s highlights (e.g., playtime) to shift focus.

• Follow-Up: Check in after school to reinforce support.

What to Do When Elders Don’t Agree with Your Parenting Style

Disagreements with elders, especially in joint Indian families, can complicate tantrum management. Dr. Ishinna advocates for teamwork over blame.

“Be in their team: ‘He has cavities from sweets—let’s set rules together,’” she suggests.

Sanchita shares her strategy of redirecting her kids to worksheets when grandparents offer screens, turning a potential conflict into a win. Dr. Ishinna explains that focusing on controllable aspects—like scheduling activities during screen time—reduces frustration. She also advises smart navigation, such as joining in when a sweet is inevitable (“Come, I’ll open it, but after dinner”), to maintain influence.

• Team Approach: Frame discussions around the child’s well-being, not criticism (e.g., “Let’s limit sweets for his health”).

• Redirection: Plan engaging alternatives like crafts during risky times.

• Choose Battles: Allow small indulgences to preserve your authority for bigger issues.

• Influence Building: Strengthen your bond with elders to gain cooperation over time.

This episode concludes with a powerful reminder: “Tantrums are part of their development… These are opportunities to make children more emotionally intelligent,” Dr. Ishinna says. Embrace them with these strategies to nurture a resilient, connected family.

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Every parent dreams of peaceful nights, but when it comes to helping babies sleep, the internet is filled with two seemingly opposing camps — Sleep Training and Gentle Sleep.
In this episode, pediatric sleep consultant Rinie Gupta and child nutritionist Sanchita Daswani break down what these terms really mean, why the debate has become so polarized, and how you can choose the right approach for your family without guilt or confusion.

What Do These Different Sleep Approaches Actually Mean?

Let’s start with the basics.

Sleep training, as defined by infant sleep researchers, is the process of teaching babies to sleep independently without needing external support such as rocking, nursing, or patting. Typically, sleep-trained babies sleep in their own cribs or beds and can fall asleep on their own.

On the other hand, Gentle Sleep focuses on optimizing sleep through environment, routines, and responsiveness, while still offering assistance. Parents might continue helping the baby fall asleep through holding, patting, or feeding and make gradual adjustments without strict behavioral techniques.

In short:

• Sleep training = structured independence.

• Gentle sleep = gradual support.

03:33 – The Main Difference Between Sleep Training and Gentle Sleep

Rinie uses a powerful metaphor, the “soothing ladder.”

At the top of the ladder is maximum support, like feeding to sleep. One step down is rocking, then contact sleep (holding or patting), followed by verbal reassurance (singing or shushing), presence in the room, and finally, at the bottom, independent sleep.

Both sleep training and gentle sleep approaches aim to move the baby down this ladder just at different speeds.

• Sleep training moves quickly often within 3–5 days using behavioral techniques to help the baby adjust.

• Gentle sleep moves slowly, following the baby’s cues, over weeks or even months.

Sleep training involves more short-term crying but achieves faster results. Gentle sleep minimizes tears but requires significant patience and consistency. Parents must weigh emotional comfort against exhaustion levels because both paths lead toward the same goal: independent, healthy sleep.

07:35 – Why Do Babies Need to Learn to Sleep Independently?

Why not just keep rocking or feeding to sleep if it works? The answer lies in sleep cycles.

Babies sleep in short cycles around 45 minutes each. At the end of a cycle, they partially wake. If they fall asleep with help, they’ll need that same help again when they wake between cycles.

So, if your baby needs rocking at bedtime, you may find yourself doing it again at 9 p.m., 11 p.m., 1 a.m., and 3 a.m. That’s exhausting.

When babies learn to fall asleep with less assistance, they can connect sleep cycles independently leading to longer, more consolidated sleep for both baby and parent.

10:23 – Is One Sleep Approach Better Than the Other?

Not really it depends on your goals and circumstances.

If your aim is to have your child sleep through the night, sleep training might be the right choice. If you prefer a slower, responsive approach and don’t mind some night wakings, gentle sleep may suit your family better.

Rinie emphasizes that it’s not just babies who differ, parents do too. Some parents can function fine after multiple night wakings, while others struggle after two. Support systems, work schedules, and personal thresholds all influence what’s sustainable.

Ultimately, there’s no universal “right” approach — only the one that helps your family be happier and well-rested.

12:30 – Choosing a Method Based on the Family’s Needs

As Sanchita points out, many parents constantly question whether they should change their baby’s sleep setup but if it’s working for you, there’s no need to fix it.

Rinie adds that a parent’s situation matters: twins, lack of help, or work demands can make certain methods more practical. Your family’s needs, not social media opinions, should guide your decision.

14:30 – Do Concepts Like Wake Windows and Bedtime Routines Apply to Both?

Concepts like wake windows, sleep environment, and bedtime routines are part of basic sleep hygiene, not specific to any one approach.

A solid sleep foundation helps both gentle and trained sleepers thrive. As Rinie says, “You cannot sleep-train a baby out of hunger or a bad schedule.” Before trying any technique, ensure your baby’s feeding patterns, environment, and nap timings are well-balanced.

16:36 – Are There Downsides to Sleep Training or Gentle Sleep?

Neither approach is harmful, despite what fear-driven posts might claim.

Sleep training does not make your child “emotionally detached” or cause long-term damage. Similarly, gentle sleep does not create “clingy” children who can’t sleep alone.

Scientific studies show no long-term differences in emotional regulation or attachment between sleep-trained and gently-sleeped babies.

However, each method has short-term challenges:

• Sleep training downside: Temporary crying. It can be emotionally hard for parents, even if brief.

• Gentle sleep downside: Ongoing unpredictability. Night wakings may persist for months, and progress can stall.

The key is informed choice — understanding what you value more: faster results with some tears, or gradual change with more parental involvement.

21:04 – Why Is Social Media So Polarized About Sleep Training?

As Rinie bluntly puts it: “Strong opinions drive clicks.”

Extreme views such as “Sleep training ruins attachment” or “If you don’t sleep train, your baby will never sleep” go viral because they provoke emotion. But much of this content is fear-mongering, not science.

She cites an example: a viral article claiming “30 years of research proves sleep training damages babies.” The truth? It wasn’t a research study at all, just two therapists’ opinions.

Another common myth comes from a Harvard study on “learned helplessness,” which was about neglected orphans, not loved babies in safe homes. Applying it to modern sleep training is misleading.

In short: beware of headlines. Always check whether claims are backed by actual research, not personal opinions disguised as science.

25:30 – Final Advice: Choosing What Works for Your Family

Rinie closes the episode with two key takeaways:

1. Define your goalposts.
   Ask yourself — what’s most important right now? More consolidated sleep, or maintaining a tear-free bedtime? Once you know, the right method becomes clearer.

2. Cut through the noise.
   The internet is full of conflicting advice. If you’re overwhelmed, consult a professional — your pediatrician or a certified sleep consultant. Just make sure their philosophy aligns with your family’s values and goals.

Sanchita adds from her own experience that if she had another child, she might consider sleep training earlier, knowing her own need for rest. That’s the essence of this discussion — every baby is different, but so is every parent.

Final Thoughts

Parenting doesn’t come with one-size-fits-all answers especially when it comes to sleep. Whether you choose sleep training or gentle sleep, what truly matters is a rested, happy family.

As Rinie beautifully sums it up:

“Both approaches are good — if they allow your family to be well-rested.”

So don’t let social media decide what’s “right.” Trust your instincts, your baby, and your own capacity — because the best sleep method is the one that brings peace to your home.

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In this episode of the Modern Indian Parent Podcast, host Sanchita Daswani sits down with Mona Narula, a Child Nutritionist and Food Psychologist, to explore how parents can raise healthy, happy eaters without guilt or power struggles. Together, they unpack practical strategies for everything from managing tantrums and picky eating to boosting immunity, balancing hormones, and making mealtimes joyful again.

Mona’s Journey into Child Nutrition

Every parent dreams of raising a happy, healthy child but mealtimes can often turn into battles. For Mona Narula, her journey into child nutrition began with her own daughter’s food sensitivities. When her little girl, allergic to food colors, once asked, “Why can’t I have that cake?”, Mona realized how limited the healthy, appealing options were for children.

She began creating meals that were nutritious, beautiful, and quick to prepare, giving rise to KidZapZo, her platform that helps parents make wholesome food exciting. Mona believes that happy kids make happy parents and vice versa so the goal is simple: to nourish joyfully.

Why We Should Care About What Our Kids Eat

Sanchita reminds us that most adults today struggle with food relationships rooted in childhood from overeating to emotional eating, and digestive issues. Mona agrees, pointing out how early exposure to junk foods has shaped our current health challenges.

Teaching children to understand what, when, and how much to eat helps them grow into self-aware, health-conscious adults. The foundation of mindful eating built between ages 5–12 can shape lifelong habits and resilience against lifestyle diseases.

How Your Child’s Tantrums Can Be Food Related

Ever noticed your child’s mood swinging wildly after a sugary breakfast? Mona explains why.
When a child starts the day with simple carbs or sugary cereals, their blood sugar spikes and then crashes, leaving them cranky, hyperactive, and craving more sugar.

Starting the day with protein-rich foods and ensuring proper hydration and sleep can stabilize mood and behavior throughout the day.

The Biggest Challenge to Getting Kids to Eat Healthy

According to Mona, the hardest phase is the “I know everything” stage. Between ages 5 and 12, kids become independent eaters influenced by peers and social circles.

Her advice:

• Be a role model because children mirror what they see.

• Build a supportive social circle with like-minded parents.

• Avoid preaching; instead, demonstrate healthy habits as a family.

Good Breakfast Options for Kids

Breakfast sets the tone for the day. Mona suggests always building the meal around protein:

• Eggs in any form

• Moong dal or besan cheela cooked in ghee or olive oil

• Vegetarian options like sprouted-grain toast or oats pancakes with nut powders

Sanchita adds that balancing complex carbs with healthy fats (like avocados, ghee, and nut butters) helps reduce cravings and maintains steady energy through the day.

Incorporating Millets in Your Child’s Diet

Millets such as ragi, jowar, and bajra are back in the spotlight, and rightly so. Mona recommends using local, seasonal millets:

• Ragi or bajra rotis in lunch

• Millet pancakes, laddoos, or cookies as snacks

For softer rotis, she suggests mixing hot water with the flour before kneading. Including millets supports gut health, provides sustained energy, and adds valuable fiber to your child’s diet.

Superfoods to Include in a Child’s Diet

Mona calls the Indian kitchen a “superfood powerhouse.”
Include:

• Moringa (fresh or powdered)

• Homemade yogurt as a probiotic

• Nuts and seeds for essential fats and minerals

• Seasonal fruits and veggies for variety

Parents can easily add these to meals by sprinkling nut powder on yogurt, mix moringa into dal, and knead seeds into rotis.

How to Help Picky Eaters Expand Their Palette

Mona reassures parents that picky eating is a phase, not a personality. The trick is patience and repetition: it may take 10–15 exposures before a child accepts a new food.

Tips to help:

• Pair new foods with familiar ones (add quinoa into rice).

• Avoid force-feeding — let children explore food safely.

• Model variety by eating diverse foods yourself.

Sanchita adds that creating a calm, pressure-free mealtime helps kids build a positive relationship with food. The goal isn’t to make them eat everything, but to make them curious.

Boosting Immunity in Kids

Immunity isn’t built by one “magic food.” It’s the result of consistent, balanced meals, sleep, and gut health. Mona’s essentials include:

• Turmeric and ginger

• Yogurt and fermented foods

• A mix of prebiotic fruits and vegetables

• Reducing sugar and junk food

Home-cooked meals remain the simplest immunity boosters.

How to Delay Puberty

Today, many parents are worried about their children entering puberty too early — a concern that’s becoming increasingly common. Mona explains that early puberty is often linked to modern lifestyle and dietary habits, not just genetics.

Excessive sugar intake, especially through packaged foods and sugary drinks, disrupts hormones and speeds up physical changes. Moreover, sedentary routines, constant screen exposure, and early access to mature content also send confusing signals to a child’s developing brain.

To help delay premature puberty, Mona suggests:

• Cut down on sugary beverages and processed foods.

• Encourage active play and outdoor time to balance hormones naturally.

• Monitor screen time and content, since mental stimulation can also influence the body’s readiness for puberty.

• Incorporate nutrient-rich foods like nuts, seeds, and garden cress seeds (Halim) — known for supporting hormonal balance and overall growth.

Above all, she emphasizes the importance of balance. Instead of labeling foods as “good” or “bad,” help kids understand why moderation matters. Creating awareness, setting consistent limits, and fostering healthy habits early on can help children’s bodies develop at a natural pace.

Helping Kids Who Only Crave Junk Food

If your child refuses homemade food, Mona says:

• Start small and set rules. For example, homemade meals four days a week.

• Involve them — show ingredient labels, discuss additives, and let them understand the “why.”

• Replace, don’t restrict: make homemade versions of favorites using ragi, jaggery, or oats.

Finally, remember that children learn best by watching. Eat mindfully and model moderation. When they see you enjoying balanced meals and occasional treats guilt-free, they’ll naturally follow your lead. With patience, consistency, and a bit of creativity, junk food cravings can transform into mindful eating habits that last a lifetime.

Healthy Snack Ideas for After School

After school, kids need refueling, not empty calories.

Mona suggests:

• Nut and seed laddoos made with ghee and jaggery

• Sweet potatoes — energy-rich and fiber-filled

• Vegetable sticks with hummus or yogurt dips

• Sprouted chillas or idlis

Alternatives to Sugary Drinks

Sugary drinks are one of the biggest culprits behind poor gut health and early puberty. Mona recommends hydrating, flavorful alternatives:

• Homemade lemonade

• Kokum sharbat

• Coconut water with lemon and salt

The key is habit formation — if you don’t stock sugary drinks at home, your kids won’t crave them.

Final Thoughts

As Sanchita and Mona emphasize, transforming mealtimes doesn’t mean making them perfect. It’s about creating awareness, balance, and joyful nourishment. When parents lead by example and approach food with curiosity rather than control, picky eaters naturally turn into food lovers.

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To bring clarity to this sensitive topic, she invites Nathan Johnson, founder of Autonomy, who specializes in helping South Asians achieve fat loss and build healthy, sustainable lifestyles without crash diets or abandoning Indian food.

Guest Intro: Nathan Johnson

Nathan has spent seven years working closely with South Asian communities to help them build healthier generations. Though not Indian himself, he has become deeply connected to the culture, understanding how traditions, family expectations, and food habits influence health.

His approach combines behavior science with cultural awareness, making his strategies realistic for busy moms who want fat loss without giving up the foods they love.

Can You Lose Weight While Eating Indian Food?

When people think of weight loss, images of salads and grilled chicken dominate. But in Indian kitchens, staples like dal, roti, sabzi, dosa, and rice are the norm.

Nathan makes it clear: you absolutely can lose weight while eating Indian food. It’s not the cuisine but the calories and portions that matter. The key is awareness and understanding how much you eat and how it’s prepared.

Adapting the Standard Indian Diet & Mindset for Weight Loss

Food in Indian culture is tied to love, respect, and family bonding. Plates are filled to the brim, and refusing food can feel disrespectful. This makes moderation difficult.

Nathan suggests shifting perception rather than eliminating foods. For example:

• If you usually eat 3–4 rotis, try 2.

• Learn portion sizes instead of eating until stuffed.

• Remember that nourishment, not indulgence, is the goal.

He also notes that while traditional meals are wholesome, they can fall short in building long-term muscle and strength, which is crucial for women’s health in their 40s and beyond.

How Much Protein Do We Really Need & What Are the Best Sources of Protein for Indians?

Protein is where the Indian diet struggles most. While dals and beans are nutritious, they don’t provide enough of the amino acid leucine, essential for muscle growth and retention.

Nathan recommends a simple rule:

• 1 gram of protein per pound of body weight.

• For a 60 kg woman (~132 lbs), that’s around 130 g protein daily.

Better protein sources include:

• Vegetarians: Dairy, soy, tofu, tempeh.

• Non-vegetarians: Chicken, eggs, fish.

Even adding larger portions of yogurt or paneer can make a significant difference.

Whey Protein—Necessary and Safe?

Many moms hesitate to use whey protein, fearing it’s “processed” or unsafe postpartum. Nathan reassures that whey is essentially filtered milk, similar to what’s left behind when making paneer.

High-quality whey powders provide a convenient, low-calorie, high-protein option, especially for moms who don’t want to cook separate meals. It’s safe, effective, and can help fill protein gaps easily.

The One-Plate Rule (Protein, Carbs, Veggies)

Nathan introduces the One-Plate Rule, a practical framework for portion control:

• Half plate: Vegetables

• One quarter: Protein

• One quarter: Carbohydrates

This rebalances the typical Indian plate (where carbs often dominate), ensuring calorie control and nutrient balance without needing to cook separately.

He also clarifies that whether you use ghee or oil, the focus should be on how much you consume, not which fat source is “better.”

Is It Necessary to Cut Sugar?

Postpartum moms are often given sugary foods like panjiri or saunth ke laddu for recovery. While sugar isn’t inherently “bad,” the quantity matters. One laddu occasionally is fine; multiple servings daily add up quickly.

Nathan emphasizes awareness over elimination. Instead of demonizing sugar, track intake and moderate portions.

Easiest Ways to Track Calories

Just like managing money, managing food requires budgeting. Most people underestimate their intake. Nathan recommends three levels of tracking:

1. Simple food log (Notes app) – Write everything you eat.

2. Apps like MyFitnessPal – For precise calorie tracking (requires weighing).

3. AI photo trackers – Convenient, but less accurate for mixed Indian dishes.

The goal is not perfection but awareness, especially on weekends and festive days, when overeating is most common.

Is Exercise Required for Fat Loss?

The truth: You can lose fat without exercise but you’ll lose muscle too. For overall health, exercise matters.

If you’re starting out, focus on:

• Prioritizing diet and calorie control.

• Adding daily walking (around 10,000 steps).

Exercise enhances results, preserves muscle, and builds long-term strength, but fat loss is still possible without it.

Weight Training Fears: Injury & “the Guy Area”

Weight training often intimidates moms—either due to fear of injury or discomfort in male-dominated gym spaces. Nathan’s advice:

• Invest in instruction – Even short-term coaching can teach correct form and prevent injury.

• Exposure therapy – Confidence grows the more you practice.

• Home alternatives – If the gym feels intimidating, use dumbbells and resistance bands at home.

Weight training isn’t about “bulking up.” It’s about staying strong enough to lift your kids, prevent back pain, and age well.

Home Workouts for Busy Moms (Bands, Dumbbells, Mat)

For moms who can’t spare hours commuting to the gym, home workouts are an excellent alternative. With just a mat, resistance bands, and dumbbells, you can achieve great results in 20–30 minutes.

Consistency and proper form matter more than equipment. Even bodyweight movements like squats, push-ups, and planks can be highly effective.

Beginner Weekly Plan (3–4 Full-Body Sessions)

Nathan recommends 3–4 full-body sessions per week, paired with walking on other days. Sample exercises include:

• Squats and lunges

• Push-ups or knee push-ups

• Planks and sit-ups

• Resistance band rows or presses

Each session can be just 20–30 minutes. The focus should be on progression: gradually lifting heavier, holding longer, or adding more reps.

How Autonomy Supports Nutrition + Training

Autonomy’s coaching program offers a three-pillar approach:

1. Nutrition plans tailored to family kitchens and cultural dynamics.

2. Accountability through daily check-ins and weekly reviews.

3. Customized training programs for home or gym, depending on lifestyle.

This high-touch model helps clients not just access information but actually transform their habits and health.

Outro & Next Steps

As Rinie wraps up, she highlights that most moms don’t lack information—they lack guidance, accountability, and sustainable strategies.

Nathan’s practical advice, from the One-Plate Rule to protein goals, calorie tracking, and beginner workouts, makes postpartum fat loss approachable without extreme diets.

For moms, the journey isn’t about “snapping back” but about building strength, health, and confidence for themselves and their families.

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In this episode of the Modern Indian Parent Podcast, host Rinie Gupta sits down with Dr. Chandni Sehgal, an experienced OBGYN and a new mom herself to talk about the real science behind these changes. Dr. Sehgal not only brings her 16 years of medical practice to the conversation but also her personal experience of navigating pregnancy and postpartum skin and hair challenges.

Introduction to the Mom Bod Series & Episode Theme

This episode is part of the Mom Bod Series on the podcast—a special set of conversations celebrating postpartum bodies. Instead of rushing to “bounce back,” the series emphasizes embracing the transformation while also learning safe and effective ways to care for yourself.

This particular episode dives into stretch marks, postpartum hair fall, and pregnancy-related skin changes like hyperpigmentation. The goal is simple: to help moms understand why these changes happen and what truly helps.

Meet Dr. Chandni Sehgal (OBGYN & New Mom)

Dr. Sehgal is not just a practicing OBGYN but also a new mother. This unique perspective allows her to blend clinical expertise with lived experience. She reassures moms that these changes are a normal maternal adaptation to pregnancy, not flaws.

What Causes Stretch Marks During Pregnancy?

Stretch marks, often called “tiger stripes,” are one of the most common pregnancy concerns.

According to Dr. Sehgal, they form when:

• Skin stretches rapidly as the belly (and other body parts) expand.

• Elastin and collagen fibers tear, creating those visible streaks.

• Hormonal changes (especially high cortisol levels) reduce the skin’s ability to regenerate elastic fibers.

While genetics play a role: if your mother or sister had them, you’re more likely to as well, lifestyle and skincare choices can influence their severity.

Her biggest reminder: Stretch marks are a natural sign of your body growing life. They’re not something to be ashamed of.

How to Prevent Stretch Marks

Dr. Sehgal emphasizes prevention through hydration, nourishment, and gentle care:

• Moisturize, moisturize, moisturize. Use thick creams or oils with cocoa butter, shea butter, almond oil, coconut oil, or vitamin E. Hyaluronic acid is also safe and deeply hydrating.

• Start early. Don’t wait for the itchy belly, begin moisturizing in the first trimester.

• Massage daily. Gentle circular massages (5–10 minutes) improve blood flow and elasticity.

• Avoid scratching. Scratching worsens fiber tears. Instead, soothe with moisturizer.

• Eat skin-friendly foods. A diet rich in protein (eggs, lentils, lean meats), vitamin C (citrus fruits, berries, kiwi), and adequate hydration (2–3 liters of water daily) supports collagen production.

Stretch Marks in Other Parts of the Body

Stretch marks don’t appear only on the belly. Rapid weight gain can trigger them on thighs, arms, breasts, and buttocks.

A key factor here is how quickly weight is gained. Ideally, pregnancy weight gain should be gradual (10–12 kg total). Rapid gain, often caused by the “eat for two” myth puts additional stress on the skin, making stretch marks more likely.

Treating Stretch Marks After Birth

Here’s the reality check: No cream or oil can make stretch marks disappear completely.

They may lighten with time and care, but eliminating them requires medical treatments such as:

• Laser therapy

• Microneedling

• Topical retinoids (safe only after pregnancy and breastfeeding)

For moms bothered by their appearance, consulting a dermatologist postpartum is the safest way forward.

Why Do Moms Experience Postpartum Hair Fall?

If you noticed thicker, shinier hair during pregnancy, you’re not imagining it. Elevated estrogen levels keep hair in the growth phase longer.

After childbirth, estrogen drops dramatically, and all those hairs that were “on pause” begin shedding at once. This phenomenon, known as telogen effluvium, is why postpartum hair fall peaks around three months after delivery.

The good news? By your baby’s first birthday, hair growth usually stabilizes.

How to Reduce Postpartum Hair Fall

While you can’t stop hormonal shedding, you can reduce severity and support regrowth:

• Check nutrition. Low iron, vitamin D, B12, zinc, and biotin are major culprits. Continue postnatal supplements (iron, calcium, vitamin D, omega-3).

• Get tested if needed. Persistent or severe hair fall may be linked to anemia, thyroid imbalance, or vitamin deficiencies.

• Be gentle with your hair. Use sulphate-free shampoos, avoid tight hairstyles, and limit heat styling.

• Massage your scalp. Gentle daily massages improve circulation and stimulate follicles.

• Try safe oils. Rosemary and tea tree oils are great natural options.

Why Women Get Dark Skin Patches During Pregnancy

Hyperpigmentation (dark patches on the face, underarms, or neck) is another common concern.

The cause? Hormones stimulate melanocytes, the skin cells that produce pigment (melanin). Areas already darker (areola, groin, underarms) often deepen in color. Many women also experience melasma (patchy pigmentation on the face).

Dark, velvety patches on the neck may sometimes indicate gestational diabetes so it’s worth discussing with your doctor if you notice them.

Treatment for Hyperpigmentation During Pregnancy

Hyperpigmentation is one of the most common skin changes during pregnancy, and the root cause is hormonal. During these months, levels of estrogen and progesterone rise significantly. These hormones stimulate melanocytes—the skin cells responsible for producing melanin, the pigment that gives skin its color. More active melanocytes mean more melanin, which leads to darker patches of skin.

Safe ways to minimize hyperpigmentation include:

• Mineral sunscreens with zinc oxide or titanium dioxide.

• Avoiding bleaching agents and harsh chemicals.

• Aloe vera for soothing and brightening.

• Pregnancy-safe actives: azelaic acid, niacinamide, and vitamin C serums

Gynaecologist-Recommended Products for Stretch Marks, Hair Fall & Skincare

Dr. Sehgal highlights Orimii, a gynecologist-approved Indian brand designed specifically for pregnant and breastfeeding women. Their range includes:

• Vitamin C serums

• Body butters

• Gentle cleansers

• Mineral sunscreen without the typical white cast

She personally used and recommended these products, appreciating the peace of mind they offer by being pregnancy-safe.

Why Retinoid-Based Products Should Be Avoided in Pregnancy

Retinoids (including retinol) are strictly unsafe in pregnancy and breastfeeding. They are teratogenic, linked to birth defects when absorbed through the skin or taken orally.

Since many women begin anti-aging routines with retinol in their 30s, it’s crucial to stop using them once pregnant or planning pregnancy.

Unsafe Ingredients to Avoid in Pregnancy Skincare

Dr. Sehgal warns against:

• Retinoids (retinol, tretinoin)

• Hydroquinone

• High-strength salicylic acid

• Chemical sunscreens with oxybenzone (potential hormone disruptors)
  

Instead, look for safe alternatives:

• Moisturizers with ceramides, peptides, and hyaluronic acid

• Mild peels with lactic or glycolic acid

• Pregnancy-safe actives like niacinamide, azelaic acid, and vitamin C

Final Thoughts: Embracing Your Mom Bod

Dr. Sehgal leaves moms with this empowering reminder:

✨ Stretch marks, hair fall, and pigmentation are normal maternal adaptations, not flaws. They are temporary changes, and your body will recover in time.

More importantly, your body has done something extraordinary by creating a whole new human being. Instead of hiding your tiger stripes, carry them as a badge of honor.

Key Takeaways

• Stretch marks can’t be completely prevented or erased but can be minimized with hydration, nutrition, and steady weight gain.

• Postpartum hair fall is temporary. Focus on nutrition, scalp care, and patience.

• Hyperpigmentation is hormonally driven. Use sunscreen, safe actives, and give it time.

• Avoid unsafe ingredients like retinoids and hydroquinone during pregnancy and breastfeeding.

• Embrace your mom bod becauseit’s a symbol of strength, resilience, and life itself.

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To shed light on this important topic, Sanchita Daswani, pediatric nutritionist and host of the Modern Indian Parent Podcast, sat down with Ankita Sahni, certified postpartum coach and founder of Mama Be Fit. Over the past five years, Ankita and her team have helped more than 2,500 mothers rebuild their strength, heal from common postpartum issues, and regain confidence in their bodies.

This conversation is part of the Mom Bod series, where mothers are encouraged to celebrate their bodies for all they’ve been through and to learn practical ways to nurture themselves during recovery.

Ankita’s Journey Into Postpartum Fitness

Ankita’s story begins with her own motherhood journey. After delivering her daughter via C-section, she assumed her background in fitness would help her bounce back effortlessly. Just a few weeks postpartum, she attempted to go for a run. But instead of feeling strong, she was left with severe back pain.

“I realized that what I was doing was the absolute worst way to return to fitness,” Ankita recalls. “There was so much information online, but it was scattered, mostly international, and not structured for Indian mothers. Even the hospital didn’t provide clear guidance.”

That personal struggle inspired Ankita to study female anatomy, specialize in postpartum recovery, and eventually launch Mama Be Fit. Today, she designs programs that bridge the gap between childbirth and long-term fitness, offering mothers a structured and supportive way to heal.

How Much Weight Gain and Loss Is Normal?

Weight gain during pregnancy and weight loss after is one of the biggest concerns for new mothers. But Ankita is quick to emphasize that there is no single “normal” number.

• Women who enter pregnancy with a higher BMI may be advised to gain less (around 6–8 kg).

• Those within a healthy BMI typically gain 8–12 kg.

• Underweight women may need to gain more to support both themselves and the baby.

Beyond numbers, factors like genetics, metabolism, and hormones play a huge role. Some mothers may shed weight quickly, while others hold onto it longer — and both are okay.

“Weight isn’t just fat,” Ankita explains. “It’s also water and fluid retention. Some people naturally ‘snap back’ faster because of genetics or a history of good nutrition and regular exercise. But others may struggle, especially if hormones and diet aren’t supporting their recovery.”

She points out a common cultural challenge in India: the tradition of feeding mothers heavy amounts of ghee, laddoos, and carb-rich foods in the first few weeks postpartum. While many of these foods contain beneficial ingredients, excess consumption often leads to stubborn weight gain. Balance, she says, is the key.

What Changes Can You Expect After Pregnancy?

New mothers often feel alarmed by the changes in their bodies — from a soft belly to back pain, bloating, or even urine leakage. Ankita urges moms to understand that while these symptoms are common, they shouldn’t be accepted as permanent or “normal.”

“Many women are told, ‘Because you had a C-section, you’ll always have a pouch,’ or ‘Epidurals will leave you with lifelong back pain.’ These are myths,” Ankita says. “There are ways to work on all of these issues.”

The key is not to resign yourself to discomfort, but to approach recovery with awareness and the right tools.

When Can You Start Working Out?

One of the most pressing questions moms ask is when they can start moving again. Ankita’s advice is clear:

• Walking can begin as soon as you feel ready. Even 10–15 minutes of gentle walking is excellent for mental health, mood regulation, and jumpstarting metabolism.

• Structured workouts depend on the type of delivery:

  • Vaginal birth: usually after 3–4 weeks

  • C-section: usually after 6–8 weeks

• Always wait for clearance from your gynecologist before starting.

Importantly, Ankita advises against jumping straight back into pre-pregnancy routines. Instead, begin with postpartum core rehabilitation.

The Best Workout for Moms

So what exactly should postpartum workouts look like? Ankita explains that they don’t resemble intense gym sessions or group classes. Instead, they focus on:

• Breathing techniques

• Core connection

• Mobility and posture

• Gentle strengthening

Only after a couple of months of this foundation should women transition back to formats like Pilates, yoga, or weight training.

Diastasis Recti: The “Mommy Pooch”

One of the most misunderstood postpartum issues is diastasis recti, commonly called the “mommy pooch.” It’s the separation of abdominal muscles to make space for the baby. While this separation should naturally heal within three months after birth, sometimes the gap persists.

Signs of diastasis include:

• A belly that still looks pregnant months later

• Constant bloating

• Unexplained back pain

Core rehab exercises, which focus on breathing, posture, and the deep abdominal muscles, can help restore function. And it’s never too late to start. “I’ve worked with moms whose children are teenagers,” Ankita says. “It may take longer, but recovery is always possible.”

Understanding Urinary Incontinence

Another common issue is urinary incontinence — leaking urine while coughing, sneezing, or exercising. Ankita explains that this happens when the pelvic floor muscles are either weak or overstressed.

“Think of the pelvic floor like an elastic band,” she says. “It needs to stretch and contract properly. Our exercises help restore that balance.”

With the right combination of relaxation and strengthening, most mothers can heal from incontinence, regaining confidence in their everyday movements.

Should You Wait Until You’ve Had All Your Kids?

Many mothers postpone working on their bodies until they’ve had their last child. Ankita advises against this approach.

“Fitness isn’t just about looking good. It’s about being strong enough to care for your babies, your home, and yourself,” she says. Strengthening your core and nutrition between pregnancies also makes future recoveries smoother and prevents issues from compounding.

The Power of Breathwork

Breathwork is one of the most overlooked yet powerful tools for postpartum recovery. Ankita calls it the holy grail.

“Even if you do nothing else, five minutes of connection breath daily can improve diastasis, posture, and back pain,” she explains. Breathwork also calms the mind, helping mothers cope with sleepless nights and the emotional overwhelm of new motherhood.

Nutrition for New Moms

When it comes to postpartum diets, Ankita emphasizes a balanced plate:

• Protein (paneer, eggs, lentils, lean meats, or shakes)

• Good fats (nuts, seeds, ghee in moderation, omega-rich foods)

• Complex carbs (quinoa, poha, upma, whole grains)

• Plenty of vegetables and fruits

• Adequate hydration

She stresses that lactation is supported more by hydration and protein than by carb-heavy meals. Unfortunately, cultural myths often restrict protein in the early days, fearing it will make babies colicky. Ankita reassures mothers that only certain foods may affect individual babies, and blanket restrictions are unnecessary.

Supplements also play a role. “Even with the best diet, our bodies need extra support after growing and feeding a baby,” she says. Multivitamins, calcium, and omega-3s are often recommended.

Busting Postpartum Myths

Some myths Ankita frequently encounters:

• “You must eat double portions for lactation.” In reality, lactation depends more on hydration and balanced nutrition.

• “Protein causes gas in babies.” Not true for most cases; only specific sensitivities may require adjustments.

• “You’ll always have a pouch after a C-section.” With rehab, the core can recover.

Do Superfoods Exist?

Instead of expensive powders or exotic ingredients, Ankita defines superfoods as seasonal and local. “Your sabzi from the nearby farm is more beneficial than imported ragi powder that’s been processed and shipped across states,” she says.

She encourages variety: three vegetables daily, multiple protein sources, seasonal fruits, and plenty of water. “Hydration is a superfood in itself,” she adds.

Many new moms are told by parents or elders to drink special waters or concoctions to “flush out toxins” and reduce water retention. Ankita clears up this common belief:

“There are no special foods that magically detox your body,” she explains. “Your liver and kidneys are already capable of eliminating toxins. What you can do is support your body by eating foods that are easy to digest and anti-inflammatory.”

Some of her practical suggestions include:

• Lemon water to ease bloating and improve digestion

• Fresh cucumber and watermelon salads for hydration and constipation relief

• Brothy soups, which are light yet nourishing and reduce inflammation

• Simple Indian spices like raw turmeric, black pepper, and herbal teas to boost metabolism

Do Body Wraps Work?

In many cultures, postpartum women are encouraged to use body wraps or tummy belts. While Ankita acknowledges they can provide back support if tied correctly, she clarifies:

“No wrap will make your stomach go back in. Only core rehab and nutrition will do that. Wraps are support tools, not slimming tools.”

Finding Time as a Mom

Perhaps the biggest challenge is time. New moms are stretched thin, juggling sleepless nights, feeding schedules, and household responsibilities. Ankita’s encouragement is simple:

• Start small — even 3 hours a week is enough.

• Take expert guidance so you don’t waste energy figuring it all out.

• Remember that showing up consistently matters more than doing everything perfectly.

“If you have time to eat or watch a show, you can make time for yourself,” Ankita says. “It’s not about laziness — it’s about starting slow, taking help, and trusting the process.”

Final Thoughts

Postpartum recovery isn’t about rushing to look like your pre-baby self. It’s about respecting your body, rebuilding strength, and giving yourself the care you deserve. With the right combination of core rehab, breathwork, balanced nutrition, and patience, every mother can feel strong, healthy, and confident again.

As Ankita beautifully concludes:
“Aesthetics will follow if you do the right things, but the real goal is to be strong — for yourself and your children.”

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Motherhood transforms us in ways that words can hardly capture. Along with the sleepless nights, messy buns, and overflowing laundry baskets, comes another big shift—the way we see and feel about our bodies.

In the Modern Indian Parent Podcast, hosts Rinie Gupta (pediatric sleep consultant) and Sanchita Daswani (pediatric nutritionist) kick off their Mom Bod Series—a heartfelt and deeply personal set of conversations that explore how women can learn to embrace, accept, and even celebrate their postpartum bodies.

Rinie mentions that this topic is close to her heart because she struggled with body acceptance long before pregnancy. After giving birth, the criticism and expectations only intensified. Looking back at the first six months of motherhood, she regrets hiding from photos and videos with her baby because she never felt “good enough” to be captured in them.

Sanchita adds that even women who are naturally slim have their struggles. For her, food became an emotional crutch, and it took years to reframe her relationship with nourishment versus indulgence. These honest admissions set the tone: postpartum body image issues are not just about weight, they’re about the stories we carry and the pressures we face.

Struggling to Love and Own Mom Bods

Rinie describes the irony of pregnancy in Indian culture: while expecting, women are told to eat more laddus, nuts, ghee, and milk. But the moment the baby arrives, the narrative flips. Suddenly, the pressure is all about “bouncing back.” She recalls an aunt openly asking her on a family video call when she planned to lose all her baby weight, just six months postpartum.

Sanchita nods to this reality too. She says that often the struggle isn’t visible to others. People might see a skinny woman and assume she has no body issues. But in truth, body image struggles live inside us all, regardless of size.

Why are We So Critical of Our Bodies?

Why are modern moms more self-critical than previous generations?

Rinie suggests that part of the answer lies in how constantly we see ourselves. Our grandmothers only had a couple of mirrors in the house. They weren’t faced with their reflections all day long. In contrast, today’s moms are surrounded by selfies, Zoom calls, FaceTimes, and social media feeds. This “always-on” reflection creates an unnatural level of self-scrutiny.

We end up analyzing ourselves the way we’re wired to analyze others for survival cues, trust signals, or connection. But when those judgment skills turn inward, they become toxic.

Sanchita shares how self-sabotage often kicks in after happy occasions. Even when she’s enjoying food and receiving compliments, reviewing photos later makes her spiral into picking apart her appearance. It’s a cycle many moms will recognize.

Celebrating What Your Body Can Do, Not How It Looks

The first practical strategy Rinie shares is to shift focus from appearance to function. Instead of criticizing her arms for being “flabby,” she reframed them as strong arms that carry her baby, cook for her family, and allow her to serve clients. This small but powerful mental switch transformed her perception.

Sanchita applied the same practice to her legs. She had avoided shorts for years, embarrassed by her thighs. But when she started appreciating her legs for helping her chase after her kids and supporting her daily movement, she also found the confidence to show them off.

Both moms stress: reframing body parts for their usefulness and strength doesn’t mean abandoning fitness goals. It simply shifts the foundation from shame to self-love, making healthy changes more joyful and sustainable.

Change the Way You Talk About Your Body (Because Your Kids Are Listening!)

Words matter, especially when our children are listening.

Rinie says she made a conscious choice to stop speaking negatively about her body out loud. She never wanted her daughter to grow up hearing her mom say, “I’m fat” or “I look ugly.” Instead, she emphasizes positivity or stays neutral. She also sets boundaries with family members, discouraging negative comments about anyone’s appearance.

Sanchita reflects on how even kids face body shaming early. Her daughter, who is naturally slim, often hears comments about being “too skinny.” To counteract this, Sanchita reframes the conversation with her child: “Your body is so strong. Look at how high you can jump!” By focusing on function, she teaches resilience against external criticism.

The takeaway? If you wouldn’t say it to your child, don’t say it about yourself.

Reframing Stretch Marks into Tiger Stripes

Few body changes cause as much angst as stretch marks.

Rinie admits she avoided maternity photos because she was ashamed of hers. Over time, she reframed them as “tiger stripes”—symbols of strength and survival. Instead of shame, they became marks of power, proof that her body endured the immense journey of pregnancy and childbirth.

Sanchita adds that she, too, had stretch marks even before pregnancy. For years, they kept her from wearing swimsuits. Only recently has she embraced them, inspired by women abroad who confidently wear bikinis of all sizes and shapes. She now owns her body without apology, and she encourages other moms to do the same.

Why Quick-Fix Diets Fail and Lifestyle Changes Win

Crash diets are tempting, but both hosts caution against them.

Rinie recalls dropping 12 kgs in three months through an extreme calorie deficit. While the quick results thrilled her, the weight quickly returned. Worse, she lost muscle and felt weaker. Now, she focuses on sustainable lifestyle changes—eating more protein, strength training, and allowing progress to be gradual.

Sanchita mentions her cycle of hopping from one diet to another—Herbalife, restrictive meal plans, fad cleanses. Each worked temporarily but ended in weight gain and frustration. What finally worked was listening to her body, nourishing it properly, and building consistency through accountability with a trainer.

Both agree: aim for habits you can keep for life, not short-term fixes.

Seeking Help is Not a Sign of Weakness

Motherhood often tricks women into believing they must “do it all alone.” But asking for help is powerful.

Sanchita describes how hiring a trainer changed her consistency. Knowing someone was expecting her three days a week kept her committed. She emphasizes that support systems—coaches, nutritionists, accountability partners—are investments in health, not luxuries.

Rinie echoes this, sharing how even online personal training gave her the push to stay on track. She reminds moms that seeking professional support for physical health is just as valid as seeking medical care for any other condition.

Therapy for Deeper Healing of Body Image Struggles

Sometimes, body image struggles run deeper than food or fitness.

Rinie stresses that many insecurities start in childhood—from relatives’ comments about weight, skin tone, or height. Pregnancy only magnifies them. That’s why therapy can be transformative. She describes it as “a doctor for your brain,” offering a safe space to unpack long-held beliefs and self-criticism.

Therapy helped her break patterns of stress-bingeing and replace them with healthier coping strategies. She encourages moms to see therapy not as weakness but as a powerful tool for inner healing.

Sanchita agrees, adding that body acceptance is as much emotional as it is physical. She reminds moms that mental wellness is part of overall health—and deserves equal attention.

Final Thoughts

Postpartum body image isn’t just about numbers on the scale. It’s about the quiet conversations in your head, the words you speak in front of your kids, and the memories you allow yourself to be a part of.

As Rinie and Sanchita suggest, here are five practical tips every mom can start practicing today:

1. Celebrate what your body can do—not how it looks.

2. Change your self-talk—your kids are listening.

3. Reframe stretch marks as tiger stripes—symbols of strength.

4. Focus on lifestyle changes, not crash diets.

5. Seek support—trainers, coaches, therapists. Help is strength, not weakness.

Above all, remember this: your mom bod tells the story of love, resilience, and life itself. Own it, honor it, and let it shine.

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High Chairs: Necessity or Option?

Rinie recalls starting her baby on solids in a bouncer because the high chair options felt overwhelming. But Sanchita recommends a proper high chair for three key reasons:

● Safety: Babies need to be upright to swallow and digest food properly. Reclined positions can increase choking risks—even with purees.
● Routine: A high chair creates a designated mealtime space.
● Practicality: Babies eventually wiggle out of laps, strollers, or couches.

Choosing the Right High Chair

Sanchita recommends looking for these features:

● Fully upright backrest (no recline).
● Adjustable footrest for stability.
● Removable, easy-to-clean tray (because mealtime will get messy).
● Right size: The baby’s elbows should rest comfortably on the tray.

She adds that while wooden chairs often provide the best support, budget-friendly options like IKEA’s Antilop can work well—with simple hacks like adding a cushion or DIY footrest. Other good options include Stokke (though pricey but long-lasting), Beaba, and Joie high chairs. Sanchita emphasizes that you don’t always need to splurge—many models can be adjusted with small hacks to work just as well.

Can Babies Eat on Floor Chairs?

While floor seats may look convenient, Sanchita says most don’t support proper posture. Babies often hunch, which is bad for digestion and eating skills. She cautions against using them, except for rare brands designed with a straight back.

Overcoming High Chair Resistance

What if your baby refuses the high chair?

● Check the root cause: It could be timing (too sleepy or not hungry), a milestone phase (wanting to crawl/walk), or negative associations.
● Avoid punishment: Don’t use the high chair as a “time-out.”
● Make it fun: Do a quick activity before meals so kids sit longer.

Rinie adds that their mistake was turning the high chair into a “threat,” which backfired. Instead, it should remain a positive, safe mealtime spot.

Best Spoons for Self-Feeding

Sanchita remembers buying spoons just by color! Now, she recommends:

● Short silicone spoons (like Num Num or Easy Peasy) — perfect for tiny hands and gentle on gums.
● Avoid long spoons — babies struggle with control.
● Skip steel at first — too harsh for little gums, though bowls can still be steel.

Rinie shares her “spoon roulette” hack: preload a second spoon so the baby willingly swaps.

Choosing Plates for Babies

Plates are about more than presentation, they help babies build eating skills.

● Silicone suction plates prevent tossing.
● Skip wooden plates at first—they’re often too bulky for babies under one.
● Rotate materials: Some babies reject silicone due to detergent smells; BPA-free plastic or stainless steel suction plates can be alternatives.

Cups and Water Introduction

Do babies need water before one year? Not really because milk is enough. Still, introducing water teaches skills:

● Start with tiny open cups at 6 months (a few sips after meals).
● Introduce straw cups at 7–8 months.
● Skip sippy cups and 360 cups—they don’t help oral development and can even pose risks.

Sanchita recommends brands like Easy Peasy, Philips Avent, or Munchkin straw cups.

Nibblers: Are They Necessary?

Those mesh or silicone fruit nibblers? Sanchita says no. They prevent babies from truly engaging with food. Exceptions:

● For teething (use frozen fruit puree or milk popsicles instead).
● For pomegranate (a choking hazard).
● For babies struggling in the first week of solids.

Otherwise, let them touch, taste, and feel real food.

Investing in Blenders for Baby Food

Many parents wonder if they really need to buy a special baby food blender or steamer-blender combo. Sanchita says it depends on your kitchen setup and feeding approach.

If you plan to offer a mix of purees and finger foods (which she often recommends), you’ll need to steam vegetables and blend them to the right texture. But that doesn’t mean you must buy an expensive gadget.

● Already own a steamer and blender? Use those—you don’t need anything extra.
● Limited kitchen space or sharing appliances? A dedicated baby blender might be helpful.
● Steaming over boiling: Always steam veggies instead of boiling to preserve nutrients.

As Rinie points out, many parents prefer a separate blender simply so baby food doesn’t pick up the strong flavors of regular Indian cooking (like garlic or spices). A basic blender reserved just for baby meals can work just fine.

Bottom line: A baby food blender is convenient but not a must-have. If your kitchen is set up for steaming and blending, you can skip the splurge.

Bibs: Essential or Optional?

According to Sanchita, bibs are worth it!

● Start with cloth bibs — lightweight and gentle.
● Avoid silicone at first — they can strain little necks.
● Move to silicone bibs around 9–10 months for better mess control.

Some parents skip bibs altogether, feeding babies in just a diaper, but bibs help build cleaner habits.

Final Takeaway

Starting solids doesn’t mean buying everything on the shelves. As Sanchita says:

“It’s worth investing in the right tools, not in all the tools.”

Focus on safety, comfort, and creating a positive mealtime routine. Skip the fads, and remember—eating is a life skill your baby will carry forever.

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Rahela Tayyabi, a trauma-informed parenting coach and mom of two boys, began her journey by sharing her parenting experiences and learnings on Instagram. What started as casual posts soon turned into a thriving community of over 200,000 parents. Her passion for gentle and respectful parenting grew as she pursued certifications and applied new insights with her children. Today, she helps parents build stronger, more connected relationships with their kids while navigating challenges like sibling rivalry.

Telling Your Child About a New Sibling

Introducing the idea of a new sibling to a young child requires patience and creativity. Rahela suggests using visual tools such as books, shows like Bluey or Daniel Tiger, or real-life examples of other families with siblings. Since toddlers struggle with abstract concepts of the future, showing them what sibling relationships look like can make the idea more concrete. Involving them in conversations and small activities during pregnancy also helps them feel included.

Supporting Kids to Accept a New Sibling

Not every child reacts positively to the news of a sibling. Some may feel upset or fearful. Rahela emphasizes validating those feelings rather than dismissing them. She shares her personal story of how her elder son struggled to connect with his newborn brother. Simple acts, like giving the elder child a gift "from the baby," can help build excitement and connection. The key is to reassure the child that their emotions are valid and that they still hold a special place in the family.

Giving Attention to the Elder Child with a Newborn

When a newborn arrives, the older child can easily feel left out as parents juggle new responsibilities. Rahela encourages parents to find small but meaningful ways to keep the elder child connected. Instead of sending them away during feedings or baby care, involve them—let them sit nearby, read together, or play while you nurse. These simple moments show the elder child they are still important. Even dedicating just 10 minutes a day of undivided, distraction-free time can strengthen the bond and reassure them that their place in your heart hasn’t changed.

Addressing Elder Child's Regression

Regression in older children, such as wanting to be fed again or reverting to using a bottle, is common when a newborn arrives. Rahela explains that these behaviors are usually attention-seeking rather than signs of lost skills. Instead of resisting or scolding, parents can gently accommodate these requests while reinforcing the child’s abilities. Over time, the child will naturally return to their independent habits once they feel secure.

Managing Sibling Rivalry

Sibling rivalry is inevitable, but how parents respond makes all the difference. Rahela notes that children often push or hit not out of malice but as a way of expressing emotions or experimenting with reactions. Setting boundaries like physically removing the baby from harm while offering safer outlets for expression (e.g., hitting a pillow) can teach children to manage strong emotions without suppressing them.

Handling Sharing Conflicts

Sharing is one of the biggest triggers of sibling conflict. Rahela challenges the common saying "sharing is caring," pointing out that even adults don’t always like to share personal items. Instead of forcing turns with strict timers, she suggests allowing one child to finish before passing a toy to the other. In cases of conflict, parents should act as "sportscasters", describing what’s happening without judgment and guide children toward solutions rather than acting as referees.

Promoting Sibling Bonds

Unstructured play, boredom, and open-ended toys (like Lego or Magna-Tiles) create natural opportunities for siblings to bond. Rahela also recommends board games and collaborative activities. However, she cautions parents against consistently siding with the younger child, as this can build resentment in the elder sibling. Encouraging teamwork and shared decision-making helps siblings build trust and connection over time.

How Do We Stop Comparing Our Kids?

Comparisons between siblings are almost instinctive for parents, but they can be harmful. Rahela explains that each child is unique, with different interests and developmental timelines. Just as adults dislike being compared to siblings or in-laws, children too can feel diminished. Parents should remind themselves that their kids are “different flowers from the same pot.” Observing and honoring each child’s individuality fosters self-esteem and harmony.

How to Manage Time Between All Kids

Time management is crucial in multi-child households. Rahela suggests carving out small pockets of one-on-one time with each child, even if it’s just 10–15 minutes daily. She encourages parents to plan “dates” with each child or alternate who accompanies them on errands to ensure individual attention. Ultimately, it’s not about the quantity of time but the quality of mindful, distraction-free connection.

Conclusion

Raising multiple children comes with its share of challenges—rivalries, regressions, and constant negotiations. But as Rahela emphasizes, the foundation of peaceful sibling relationships lies in the parent-child bond. When children feel secure in their connection with their parents, they’re less likely to compete for attention. With mindful practices, validation of emotions, and intentional moments of connection, families can foster not just coexistence, but genuine sibling love and harmony.

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Postpartum is often painted as a rosy picture filled with cuddles, coos, and camera-ready smiles. But for many Indian moms, reality feels messier — sleepless nights, tears, anxiety, and even anger.

Bollywood and Instagram have romanticized new motherhood, often leaving women shocked when their own experience feels far from the ideal.

In this episode of The Modern Indian Parent Podcast, host Rinie Gupta speaks with Siddhida Kabara, an award-winning psychologist and maternal mental health expert, about postpartum mental health — from baby blues to postpartum depression (PPD) and postpartum anxiety (PPA). They discuss the causes, warning signs, and practical coping strategies for moms and their families.

Most Common Mental Health Problems Indian Moms Face

Siddhida explains that one of the biggest emotional hurdles for new mothers is mourning their old identity while figuring out who they are in this new role. It’s not just about adding “mother” to your identity — it’s about reconciling your past self with the version of you who now carries the responsibility of a child.

In India, this transition is layered with cultural and family dynamics. During pregnancy, a woman is often pampered and treated like the center of the household. But once the baby arrives, attention shifts entirely to the newborn. The mother’s physical recovery may get some acknowledgment, but her mental well-being is rarely discussed.

This invisibility, combined with sleep deprivation, self-esteem issues, body image concerns, and a lack of personal time, can trigger emotional distress.

Siddhida points out that these challenges are not just “in the head” — they are a natural consequence of biological changes, social expectations, and the immense physical and emotional load that comes with motherhood.

Physiological and Social Causes of Baby Blues, PPD, and PPA

Hormonal changes play a huge role. After birth, there’s a sudden crash in pregnancy hormones, leaving moms more emotionally vulnerable. Even breastfeeding, while beneficial, takes a physical toll on the body.

From a social perspective, unsolicited advice and criticism can worsen stress. Relatives may question a mom’s feeding choices or parenting style, undermining her confidence.

Siddhida advises setting boundaries early, ideally with the father stepping in to manage his side of the family, so that the mother isn’t labeled as “difficult” or “ungrateful.”

Difference Between Baby Blues and Postpartum Anxiety/Depression

• Baby Blues: Emotional ups and downs in the first two weeks after birth, caused by hormonal shifts. Moms are still functional and aware of their feelings.

• PPD/PPA: If symptoms last beyond two to three weeks and interfere with daily functioning such as persistent sadness, numbness, crying spells, or constant worry, it’s time to seek help.

Key difference: Baby blues pass with time; PPD/PPA needs intervention.

Siddhida suggests viewing therapy like other postpartum care. Just as you’d see a lactation consultant or nutritionist, having a mental health professional ready can prevent crises.

Warning Signs Dads Can Look For to Spot Serious Postpartum Mental Health Issues

Fathers and family members can help spot problems early. Red flags include:

• Over-controlling behavior about baby care.

• Withdrawal and refusing to talk about feelings.

• Visible loneliness or feeling misunderstood.

If the mom isn’t opening up despite a supportive environment, it may be time to encourage professional help.

Rinie’s Struggle with Postpartum Mental Health and Mom Rage

Rinie shares her own struggle with intrusive thoughts, constant checking on my baby’s breathing, and anger when things didn’t go “perfectly.”

Siddhida explained that mom rage is often misdirected as the frustration is with the situation, not the baby. Recognizing this difference helps reduce guilt and prompts seeking coping strategies before it escalates. This awareness, Siddhida notes, is the first step toward finding healthier coping mechanisms and reducing guilt.

How to Get Help for PPD/PPA

The first step is to find the right therapist — someone you connect with and trust. This can take time, so Siddhida advises starting the search during pregnancy, not in the middle of a crisis.

If you don’t know where to begin, ask trusted friends or other parents for recommendations.

How Therapy Can Help with PPD/PPA

Siddhida explains that therapy offers a safe, confidential, and non-judgmental space for mothers to share thoughts and emotions they may hesitate to voice elsewhere. It helps them process difficult feelings, understand their triggers, and develop personalized coping strategies.

She compares it to having a skilled barista make coffee for you. Even if you know how to make it yourself, having someone experienced prepare it during a challenging time can be a relief. In the same way, therapy provides a structured, supportive environment when a mother may not have the mental energy to manage her struggles alone.

Alternate Strategies to Cope with PPD/PPA

Siddhida suggests:

• Creating “me-time” moments — even five minutes with tea on the balcony can help.

• Journaling or audio venting — record thoughts on your phone if writing feels too much.

• Deep breathing to calm an overstimulated nervous system.

• Reframing in the heat of the moment — asking, “Am I angry at my baby or at the situation?”

• Practicing self-regulation before re-engaging with the baby.

She also reassures parents: crying is a baby’s language, not always a sign something’s wrong. A few minutes apart to calm yourself benefits both mom and baby.

Conclusion

Postpartum mental health is as important as physical recovery, yet it’s often neglected in Indian households. By understanding the difference between baby blues and more serious conditions like PPD and PPA, families can act early to support moms.

Whether it’s therapy, self-care routines, or simply having an empathetic listener, support systems can transform the postpartum experience from a lonely struggle to a manageable , even empowering, journey.

If you or someone you know is going through postpartum mental health challenges, reach out to professionals like Siddhida Kabara and her team. The right help at the right time can make all the difference.

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In this episode of The Modern Indian Parent Podcast, host Sanchita Daswani sits down with Solid Starts’ senior members Kim Grenawitzke and Kary Rappaport—both pediatric occupational therapists and feeding/swallowing specialists—to demystify baby-led weaning and offer real, actionable guidance to help parents feel confident.

Meet the Experts: Kim & Kary

Kim and Kary bring over 15 years of experience each as pediatric occupational therapists. Their journey into the world of baby-led weaning began in hospitals, working with medically fragile infants. Their shared vision? Make feeding less stressful and more joyful for families. Their work laid the foundation for Solid Starts’ widely trusted courses, app, and resources used by parents and professionals across the world.

What Is Baby-Led Weaning?

Baby-led weaning is not new. In fact, it's how babies were fed before commercial baby food was industrialized. As Kary explains, BLW means letting the baby take the lead, whether it's with a spoon, mashed food, or finger foods. The focus isn't on skipping purees, but on letting the baby self-feed in a developmentally appropriate way.

When Is Baby Ready to Start Solids?

Kary emphasizes that developmental readiness is more important than age. She outlines three key signs:

1. Baby can sit upright with little support

2. Baby can use their hands to bring food to their mouth

3. Baby shows interest in food and mealtimes

Kim points out that most babies show these signs around six months but it could be a little earlier or later, depending on the baby.

Is It Safe to Start Finger Foods Right Away?

Yes! In fact, babies are safest when starting solids at six months due to strong protective reflexes like gagging and tongue-thrusting. These mechanisms prevent choking, especially when babies self-feed. Delaying finger foods can actually reduce the opportunity for safe skill-building.

What If Baby Takes a Big Bite?

This is one of the most common fears among parents starting baby-led weaning and completely understandable. But as Kary explains, the key is to trust your baby’s instincts and reflexes.

When babies self-feed, Kary says, their brain begins preparing for the experience the moment they see, reach for, and grasp the food. This helps activate protective oral reflexes that keep them safe. “It’s not a bad thing if your baby bites off a big piece—it’s actually how they learn,” she reassures.

Kim adds that bigger bites often look scarier than they are. “Choking is more likely with small, round, hard or slippery foods like nuts or grapes, not large, soft bites,” she explains. The airway is narrow about the size of a drinking straw so larger pieces typically can’t block it. What usually happens instead is that baby either spits the food out or swallows it with the help of their naturally stretchy food pipe.

Kim and Kary both emphasize:

• Let baby feed themselves (never place food directly in their mouth)

• Stay calm if they gag or spit—this is a protective mechanism

• Avoid known choking hazards like whole nuts, raw carrots, or firm apple slices

And perhaps most importantly, Kary reminds parents: “Spitting is not failing. Spitting is learning. It's a life-saving skill.”

When Do Babies Start Actually Eating?

Kim explains that the journey looks different for every baby. Some take weeks or months to start swallowing food, while others seem to “get it” from day one. Regardless, practice is key.

Kary reminds parents that breast milk or formula remains the baby’s primary source of nutrition during the first year. So even if a baby swallows very little at the table, they’re still getting all they need.

What If My Family Doesn’t Support BLW?

In many Indian households, feeding is a deeply emotional, cultural ritual and change is often met with resistance. So what do you do when your baby-led weaning approach is met with judgment, confusion, or concern?

Kary recommends starting with empathy. “It’s hard when someone you love believes what you’re doing might harm your baby. But often, their concern comes from love, not from science.” She encourages parents to calmly explain that feeding recommendations have evolved.

Kim suggests validating your family’s role. Instead of defending BLW, include them in the process: show them your baby’s cues, the way they chew and explore, and the joy they experience at the table.

If they’re still resistant, Kary says to remember this: “Breastmilk or formula is still the baby’s main nutrition source for the first year. Even if they don’t eat anything at the table today, they’re not going hungry.”

Above all, Kim and Kary encourage creating a calm, joyful mealtime environment where pressure is low and curiosity is high. Over time, even skeptical grandparents may be won over by the baby’s progress.

How Do We Know Baby Ate Enough?

Kim says the measure of a successful meal is not how much the baby ate but what they experienced. Did they touch the food? Sit at the table? Play with the textures? All of that counts as learning. Kary compares it to learning soccer: you don’t expect a goal on day one. First comes showing up, then watching others, then slowly participating. Mealtimes are the same.

It’s not about quantity. Just like learning to walk, eating is a process with many small milestones.

Do We Need to Offer One Food for Three Days?

Kary debunks the outdated “three-day rule,” explaining there’s no scientific basis for it except when introducing allergens. She encourages parents to expose babies to a variety of foods regularly, even if not daily.

When and How to Introduce Allergens?

Kim explains that the latest research clearly supports introducing common allergens early and often. This helps reduce the risk of developing food allergies, not increase it.

She recommends starting with the top three priority allergens:

• Egg

• Peanut

• Dairy

Once your baby shows signs of developmental readiness (usually around 6 months), Kim suggests introducing a small amount of the allergen over three consecutive days:

• Day 1: A tiny taste (¼ tsp)

• Day 2: A little more (½ tsp)

• Day 3: A full teaspoon

This helps observe any reactions while gently exposing the body to the food.

Kary adds that keeping allergens in the baby’s diet regularly, ideally 2–3 times per week, is just as important as introducing them early. “The research shows that continued exposure through age five offers the best protection,” she explains.

For babies at higher risk of allergies (especially those with severe eczema or an existing food allergy), Kary recommends consulting a pediatrician or allergist. In some cases, allergens may be introduced as early as 4 months, even before starting solids broadly.

Worried about reactions? Kim advises keeping an antihistamine at home, and some parents even choose to introduce new allergens in their doctor’s office for peace of mind.

Finally, Kim reminds parents: “Shellfish is the one allergen that can be delayed, especially if it’s not a part of your family’s regular diet. But the others especially egg, peanut, and dairy are nutritious, important, and should be introduced confidently.”

Can We Add Spices to Baby’s Food?

Kim encourages parents to introduce the flavors their family eats. Spices like turmeric, coriander, and cumin are all safe and even beneficial. Just go slow and observe your baby’s response.

Kary advises separating spices that add heat (like chili or pepper) from those that add flavor, starting with low amounts and gradually increasing. She recommends pairing spicy foods with cooling options like yogurt and modeling how to manage spicy sensations.

What Is FPIES?

Kim defines FPIES (Food Protein-Induced Enterocolitis Syndrome) as a rare, delayed food allergy that usually presents with vomiting or diarrhea a few hours after eating a trigger food. Avocado, egg, sweet potato, and wheat are common culprits.

Kary emphasizes that FPIES is rare and most reactions babies have are not allergies but normal digestive adjustments. She discourages parents from pulling foods out of their baby's diet unnecessarily.

What If Baby Refuses to Put Food in Their Mouth?

Kary says this may happen if the baby isn’t quite ready or if they've been pressured. She recommends taking a step back, reducing pressure, and modeling eating. Sometimes, eating in a new location or holding the baby during meals helps reset the experience.

Kim suggests that if you're offering purees, make sure you're also eating them too—babies learn by watching!

What If Baby Only Takes One Bite and Throws the Food?

Kim says throwing food usually means “I’m done.” The meal might have been enough stimulation or the baby could be too hungry to practice a new skill. Offering a breast or bottle before solids can help.

Kary adds that sometimes, babies just need ideas for what else they can do with the food. She suggests tapping the food, mashing it, or modeling new actions to re-engage baby. But if baby is clearly done, it’s okay to end the meal.

Final Takeaway

“Don’t panic,” Kary says. “Let your baby lead.”

Kim reminds us: mealtimes should be joyful, not stressful.

When we focus less on how much and more on how it feels, we empower babies to build lifelong positive relationships with food.

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Whether you're a full-time working mom, on a career break, or managing a home-based business, this guide is your financial wake-up call.

Mistake 1: Outsourcing All Money Matters to the Husband

Too many women hand over all financial responsibilities to their husbands from their bank accounts and investments to insurance and retirement planning. This leaves them vulnerable in times of crisis.

👉 Why this is a mistake:

• Limits your financial autonomy.

• Assumes your partner is always making the best financial choices.

• Creates risk during events like divorce, death, or disability.

👉 How to fix it:
Arpita strongly recommends starting with financial visibility.

• List all financial assets and liabilities: Joint accounts, FDs, SIPs, insurance policies, loans.

• Hold monthly money meetings with your spouse to stay aligned.

• Track finances together using a spreadsheet or diary—whatever works best.

• Don’t assume your partner is better at this—Arpita advises that women often discover they're more financially intuitive once they get involved.

Mistake 2: Not Having a Personal Bank Account or Emergency Fund

Many women either give their entire salary to their spouse or never open a personal account. This removes their ability to make quick, independent financial decisions.

👉 Why this is a mistake:

• You lack control in emergencies.

• Personal goals and needs get deprioritized.

• Creates long-term dependency.

👉 How to fix it:
Arpita advises every woman to maintain a personal bank account, even in the most loving, transparent relationships.

• Keep a personal emergency fund that only you can access.

• Set up a joint account for household expenses, but maintain individual accounts for personal spending.

• Decide contributions based on income- Arpita suggests discussing a fixed amount or percentage depending on what suits your family’s structure.

Mistake 3: Saving Without Investing

Indian women are skilled savers but often avoid investments, relying instead on FDs or gold jewelry which are not sufficient for long-term financial growth.

👉 Why this is a mistake:

• Gold is often emotional and not liquid.

• FDs rarely beat inflation.

• You lose money in the long run by not investing.

Imagine this:

A woman comes to Arpita and says, “I have ₹20,000 saved up and I want to invest this money but I’m scared. I don’t know where to begin, and I don’t know which platforms to trust.”

This, Arpita shares, is incredibly common and exactly why she co-founded CashVisory.

👉 How to fix it:
Arpita recommends a guided, beginner-friendly approach to start investing—even if you’re starting small and scared.

• Step 1: Understand your risk appetite
  Not everyone is comfortable with the same level of volatility. CashVisory offers a simple 5-question quiz to help you assess yours.

• Step 2: Match your investment to your risk
  Arpita advises first-time investors to begin with mutual funds, ETFs (Exchange Traded Funds), or index funds. These diversify your money across companies and reduce the risk of losses tied to a single stock.

  

  Step 3: Know the difference
  Arpita explains:

  • Stocks are shares of one company. If the company does well, you benefit. If not, you lose.

  • Mutual funds are bundles of stocks, bonds, or both—spreading risk across multiple companies.

  • Index funds track the performance of major market indices (like the NIFTY 50 or S&P 500), making them a simple, cost-effective entry point.

• Step 4: Use guided tools
  Through CashVisory, Arpita and her team curate personalized mutual fund portfolios based on your risk appetite and goals. You don’t need to sift through thousands of funds—everything is automated and customized for beginners.

• Step 5: Automate and forget
  Once set up, your SIPs (Systematic Investment Plans) can run monthly with minimal effort. The key, as Arpita says, is to just get started.

Arpita also suggests building your own personal investment portfolio—not just joint investments. Whether you’re saving for your parents’ future, launching a business, or just want the autonomy to make financial decisions without asking anyone, your investment journey should reflect your unique goals.

🎁 And for those still unsure? Arpita is offering a free 30-minute consultation via the CashVisory website—no spam, no pressure.

Mistake 4: Spend First, Save Later Mindset

In many households, expenses are covered first, and savings come from whatever is left—usually very little. This backward approach can derail future financial goals.

👉 Why this is a mistake:

• Inconsistent saving leads to poor financial discipline.

• You’re less likely to hit long-term goals.

• Seeing “extra money” in your account can lead to unnecessary spending.

👉 How to fix it:
Arpita suggests flipping the script: Save first, spend later.

• Set a savings target and treat it like a monthly bill.

• Automate savings/investments at the start of the month via standing instructions.

• Use a separate bank account with no UPI or card access to minimize temptation.

• Aim to save 10–20% of your income. Arpita recommends starting with 5% if needed and scaling up gradually.

“Treat your savings like rent, it’s non-negotiable,” Arpita advises.

Mistake 5: Taking a Career Break Without a Financial Plan

Whether due to childcare or burnout, many women pause their careers but few do it with a financial strategy. This can result in insecurity, loss of independence, and disrupted investments.

👉 Why this is a mistake:

• No active income means a drop in contribution to family finances.

• Investments often stop, which can impact long-term wealth.

• Insurance coverage and EMIs can suffer without planning.

👉 How to fix it:
Arpita strongly recommends planning your runway before stepping away from your career.

• Get private insurance (health + term) if you rely on corporate coverage.

• Build a 6–12 month emergency fund that includes your personal and household contributions.

• Continue SIPs and investments during your break—don’t let compound growth halt.

• Discuss liability coverage: Ensure your spouse’s income can cover EMIs and key expenses.

“The goal is to come back to earning without having your financial life in ruins,” Arpita says.

Final Thoughts

These money mistakes aren't about ignorance—they stem from tradition, conditioning, and lack of access. But now that you're aware, you can act.

Arpita suggests:

• Gaining financial visibility is step one.

• Conversations about money should be regular and open.

• Investing isn’t just for men or finance bros—it’s for every mom planning her family’s future.

"You don’t need to be a finance expert to take charge. You just need to start."

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In this insightful episode, host Sanchita Daswani sits down with Khushbu Thadani, manifestation mentor and founder of K-Way, to explore how parents (yes, even sleep-deprived ones!) can tap into their inner power and manifest the life they truly want.

Khushbu’s Journey Into Manifestation

Khushbu’s story is deeply personal. She began as a health coach after losing 75 pounds, but soon realized that true transformation required more than just diet and exercise. Despite achieving her fitness goals, she still struggled with self-worth and fear. That’s when manifestation entered her life, not as a “magical” concept, but as a grounded practice to help shift her mindset and create intentional change.

She explains, “When you truly understand how simple it is to change your life, you’ll see your entire world open up.”

What does Manifestation mean?

Manifestation isn’t about “wishful thinking.” It’s about intentionally becoming the version of yourself that aligns with the life you want. Your external world mirrors your internal state. So if you want change, it starts within.

Khushbu defines it as:

“The phenomenon where you turn something from your imagination into your reality by shifting your state of being.”

Skepticism Around Manifestation

There’s often skepticism around manifestation—thanks in part to oversimplified ideas popularized by movies like The Secret. Khushbu acknowledges this and clarifies: you aren’t making things happen from thin air—you’re allowing things to flow to you by becoming the kind of person who is ready to receive them.

“You’re co-creating with the universe. It’s not passive—it’s deeply active and intentional.”

She shared a powerful example: imagine someone who constantly ends up with partners who cheat. Instead of saying “all men cheat,” what if she looked inward and questioned the belief system that’s playing on loop? If she starts believing that trustworthy, loving partners do exist, and shifts her mindset accordingly, her outer world will begin to reflect those new beliefs. It’s not overnight but it’s real.

If you’re curious but hesitant, here’s the invitation: don’t start with huge goals. Start small. Play with the idea. See what happens when you shift just one belief or habit. The change often begins the moment you decide to think and be differently.

Getting Clear on Your Vision

Before anything can manifest, you need to know what you actually want. Saying “I want more money” is too vague. Khushbu compares it to ordering at a restaurant “more food” won’t get you what you crave.

Manifestation requires clarity. When you get specific—“I want to earn ₹1,00,000 a month through my own coaching business” or “I want to feel calm and present with my kids every morning”—you give the universe (and your subconscious mind) something to actually work with.

But what if you don’t know what you want? That’s okay too.

Khushbu recommends starting with what you don’t want, and then flipping it. This “clarity through contrast” approach helps turn your complaints into compass points. For example:

• “I don’t want to feel burnt out all the time” → “I want more balance and energy in my day.”

• “I’m tired of financial stress” → “I want to feel safe and secure with my income.”

Another clue? Jealousy. That twinge of envy you feel when you see someone living a life you admire? It’s not a bad thing, it’s data. It’s your subconscious nudging you: “You want that too.” Use it to get more honest about your own desires.

The Power of Vision Boards

Yes, but only after you’ve done the internal work. Vision boards can help keep your goals top of mind and subtly reprogram your subconscious mind to expect and accept your desires. It’s not about “pasting and waiting”, it’s about constantly feeding your mind with aligned thoughts and energy.

Regulating Your Nervous System

This is huge, especially for parents living in constant “go mode.”

“We’re wired for safety, not happiness. If your body doesn’t feel safe with a new reality like more money or weight loss, you’ll push it away without even realizing.”

Nervous system regulation isn’t just morning meditation. It’s your lifestyle, your boundaries, your self-talk, your community. Your energy is your currency and you can’t pour from an empty cup.

Finding Abundance in Negative Situations

Even if you’re broke or struggling with weight, you can still shift your perception. That’s not toxic positivity, it’s neuroplasticity in action. It takes intentional thinking to rewire your default patterns, but it is possible.

Sanchita shared how she flipped her own mindset: instead of dreading expenses, she began celebrating them as proof of her own abundance and ability. That energy shift made a tangible difference, not just in her mood, but in the outcomes she started to attract.

Try this: the next time you pay a big bill, instead of panicking, say, “I’m so grateful I can pay this.” It signals trust in abundance rather than fear of lack.

Aligning Behavior with Manifestation Goals

Here’s the truth: you can journal, visualize, and say affirmations all day but if your actions don’t reflect your desires, you’ll stay stuck. Manifestation isn’t just mindset, it’s movement.

“It’s like asking to win the lottery without ever buying a ticket,” Khushbu laughs.

Once you’re clear on what you want, your next question should be: How would the version of me who already has this behave? If you’re manifesting health, would she prioritize rest, nourish her body, and speak kindly to herself?

If you’re manifesting abundance, would she hide from money conversations or learn to manage and welcome wealth?

Khushbu reminds us that worthiness is often the missing link. We stop ourselves from taking action because, deep down, we don’t feel we deserve the outcome. But here’s the shift:

“You don’t wait to feel worthy after the result. You practice worthiness now and the result follows.”

Steps for Postpartum Moms to Manifest Goals

If you're a new mom and feeling overwhelmed, here’s how to get started:

1. Accept the season you’re in—honor your current capacity.

2. Practice flexible consistency—ditch the all-or-nothing mindset.

3. Nurture your nervous system—even a few deep breaths or mindful gratitude can shift your state.

4. Choose one habit—a walk, journaling, or drinking more water. Small steps = big momentum.

Timing of Manifestation

It’s easy to get discouraged when you’re doing all the right things (visualizing, journaling, taking action) and your desires still haven’t shown up. But according to Khushbu, manifestation doesn’t happen when you want it, it happens when you’re ready for it. Often, we’re still subconsciously resisting the very thing we say we want. Your nervous system might not feel safe receiving a big change like more money, weight loss, or a new relationship, especially if it’s unfamiliar. And when something feels unsafe, we push it away without even realizing it.

Instead of asking “Why hasn’t it happened yet?” try asking: “How can I align even more with what I’m calling in?” She shares how she manifested public speaking gigs only after spending months practicing unscripted podcast episodes. That preparation signaled to the universe: I’m ready.

So remember, timing isn’t about delay. It’s about alignment. You don’t wait to pack after your flight has landed, instead you prepare in advance, trusting the trip is happening.

Overcoming Fear for Mothers Starting a Business

Many mothers have dreams beyond parenting like building a business, launching a project, or returning to a creative passion. But fear often gets in the way.

Fear of failure. Fear of judgment. Fear of not being “good enough” anymore.

Khushbu hears this all the time, and her response is powerful:

“You brought a human into this world. You can absolutely start a business.”

If you’re waiting for the perfect time, confidence or external approval, it may never come. What will come is regret if you never try. Khushbu encourages moms to ask themselves: “In 20 years, how will I feel if I’m in the same place, still waiting?” Your kids don’t just listen to what you say but they absorb how you show up. When they see you chase your dreams, take risks, and trust yourself, they learn to do the same.

You don’t have to take massive steps. Start small. Take one action. Learn one skill. Block one hour for your idea. That’s how momentum builds and fear starts to shrink.

Resources for Learning About Manifestation

Feeling inspired to begin your manifestation journey but don’t know where to start? Khushbu shares some simple ways to dive in without overwhelm.

🎧 Khushbu’s Podcast: The Fit & Fulfilled Podcast
📱 Follow Her: @khushbu.kway
💬 DM Her to learn about private coaching, group programs, or to simply say hi.

Conclusion

Whether you’re a new mom navigating sleepless nights, a parent dreaming of launching a passion project, or simply someone seeking more calm, clarity, or joy, manifestation gives you tools to move forward with intention.

Khushbu reminds us that you don’t have to be perfect. You just have to be willing to get clear on what you want, take small aligned actions, and become the version of yourself who believes she’s worthy of more.

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Whether your toddler isn’t speaking much yet, or you're wondering how to encourage better communication early on, this episode is packed with insights that every parent needs.

How to Know If Your Child Has a Speech Delay

Bisma explains that delays can be identified as early as one year old. Key milestones include:

• 1 year: Babbling, responding to name, simple back-and-forth interaction.

• 18 months: At least 10–12 meaningful words (like “mama,” “doodoo,” “ball”).

• 2 years: Around 80–100 words, beginning to form 2-word phrases.

• 3 years: Delays become more obvious—gestures may replace words.

Early detection means early support, and Bisma stresses that parents shouldn't “wait and see.”

Busting the Most Common Myths

Myth 1: “Boys talk late”

While slight differences exist, boys and girls both fall within the same developmental range. Assuming boys can take longer is a harmful myth.

Myth 2: “They’ll talk when they’re ready”

No, they might not. “Waiting it out” risks losing precious early learning years. Therapy is now accessible, effective, and most importantly—gentle and play-based.

Myth 3: “Multiple languages cause delays”

Bilingual and multilingual homes are not to blame. Children (even those with developmental challenges) are capable of learning multiple languages from birth. Don’t hold back on your cultural richness.

Where Parents Might Be Doing Wrong

1. Early & Excessive Screen Time

Even 3-month-olds are being exposed to screens. This harms not only speech but also cognitive, motor, and attention development.

2. Not Talking With Your Child (Even When You’re There)

In today’s busy, tech-filled homes, kids may be surrounded by caregivers, toys, or even learning gadgets—but not conversation. Simply handing over a bottle when they gesture or buying educational toys isn’t enough. Whether it’s changing a diaper or opening a snack, narrate your actions, label feelings, and pause to let them respond. Bisma puts it perfectly:
“You are the best toy your child needs.”- Bisma

Teaching Academic vs Functional Words

If your toddler knows their colors, shapes, and even the ABC song—but still can’t ask for water—it’s a sign they’re learning academic words, not functional ones. Bisma breaks down why teaching kids words that help them express their needs, feelings, and discomforts (like “more,” “all done,” or “mama”) is far more valuable in early years than rote knowledge. It's not about sounding smart—it's about being understood.

Why and How To Teach Baby Sign Language & Gestures To Aid Talking

Before your baby can talk, they can communicate with gestures—and that’s a huge win. Bisma Shaikh strongly recommends teaching baby signs from as early as 5 to 6 months. Why? Because babies often understand far more than they can say. Gestures act as a bridge between what they feel and how they express it. It reduces frustration—for them and for you. And no, using gestures won’t delay speech. In fact, it does the opposite—it builds the foundation for verbal language.

👶 A Few Useful Signs to Start With:

• 👋 Hi/Bye

• 🙋‍♀️ Help

• 🤲 All done

• 🍼 Milk

• 💤 Sleep

• 🧼 Wash hands

🧠 How to Teach Them?

Model them. Use the gestures consistently during everyday routines. For example, when you say “All done,” make the sign too. Over time, your child will begin to understand—and use—them to communicate back.

Think of it as giving your baby a voice, even before the words arrive.

What Is Speech Therapy and How Does It Work?

When parents hear “speech therapy,” they often imagine flashcards, drills, or sitting across from a therapist repeating words. But for toddlers, speech therapy looks very different—and far more natural.

As Bisma Shaikh explains, speech therapy is play-based and tailored to each child. It helps kids:

• Understand and process language

• Learn how to express their needs

• Build real communication skills through daily routines

For young children, especially toddlers, therapy isn’t just about what the therapist does—it’s about coaching parents on what they can do at home. You’ll learn strategies like modeling, pausing, and engaging in back-and-forth interactions that boost your child’s ability to speak and connect.

The goal?
To empower you, the parent, with tools you can use every day—during playtime, mealtime, bath time—to help your child thrive.

How Long Does It Take?

There’s no fixed number of sessions. Every child is different—some may need a few months of support, others longer. But if therapy is being done correctly, parents should begin seeing noticeable progress within three months.

The magic lies in consistency—not perfection. A few small changes in how you interact with your child can lead to big developmental gains over time.

Easy Speech Strategy: Self-Talk + Pause + Repeat

According to speech therapist Bisma Shaikh, one of the most effective strategies is something every parent can do at home—and it starts with how you narrate your everyday life.

✅ Here's how it works:

1. Self-Talk
Describe what you’re doing in the moment, out loud, using clear and simple words. For example:
🗨️ “You brought your bottle! You want water? Let’s go get water.”
This helps your child associate words with real-life actions and needs.

2. Pause
After describing what’s happening, pause intentionally. This gives your child time to absorb what you said and, if they’re ready, try responding or repeating. Even a small sound, gesture, or word attempt is a step forward.

3. Repeat
Use the key word again—slowly, clearly, and in context. For example:
🗨️ “Water. You want more water?”
Repeating reinforces the vocabulary without pressuring the child to mimic it right away.

This approach mirrors how children naturally learn language: through repetition, exposure, and meaningful interaction. When you use real-life situations (like snack time, bath time, or playtime) to model language, it becomes functional—not abstract.

As Bisma says:

“The words your child needs most are the ones connected to what they’re doing and feeling—not random pictures on a card.”

Is It Okay To Do Baby Talk?

Bisma says skip the cutesy “baba-wawa” talk. Instead, use real words but with intonation and enthusiasm to capture your child’s attention. Think: “You want water? Let’s get water!” instead of “Wawa?” The tone helps them engage, and the clear language helps them learn.

How to Contact Bisma To Get Help

If you suspect your child has a speech delay or you’re just unsure how to support their language journey, Bisma offers virtual consultations for parents.

Visit her website: www.thespeakingmummy.com
Or email her directly: thespeakingmummy@gmail.com

The site also includes free resources, developmental milestones, and more to help you get started.

Conclusion

If your child isn’t talking yet, don’t panic—but don’t wait it out either. Speech delays are more common than you think, and with the right support, most kids make incredible progress.

Start by focusing on real connection: reduce screen time, model simple words, use gestures, and speak during everyday routines. And if you need guidance, speech therapy can make all the difference—especially when started early.

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In this eye-opening episode of The Modern Indian Parent Podcast, host Sanchita Daswani sits down with Dr. Sivaranjani Santosh—an experienced pediatrician and fierce advocate against misleading parenting trends. Together, they decode the world of supplements for babies and children, bringing much-needed clarity to an often confusing topic. From iron and vitamin D to milk mixes and ORS, this episode is packed with practical advice and evidence-backed insights every parent should know.

Dr. Sivaranjani's Journey

Before diving into supplements, Dr. Sivaranjani shares her mission-driven journey into pediatrics. What began as a desire to counteract misinformation has blossomed into a social media movement that has empowered thousands of parents.

Dr. Sivaranjani shares:

• Many parents are well-meaning but overwhelmed by misinformation.

• She took to social media to deliver clear, trustworthy guidance.

• Her focus remains on simple, science-backed advice, not trends.

Importance of Supplements for Babies

Not every baby needs a shelf full of supplements. According to Dr. Sivaranjani, supplementation is based on the baby’s birth weight, diet, and specific needs—not a one-size-fits-all approach.

Dr. Sivaranjani recommends:

• Vitamin D is the only supplement required for healthy term babies.

• Iron should be added at 4 months if the baby is exclusively breastfed.

• Low birth weight or preterm babies need:

  • Iron from 2 weeks of age to 1 year.

  • Vitamin D until their first birthday.

  • Calcium and multivitamins until they reach 3 kg.

Do Formula-Fed Babies Need Vitamin D and Iron?

Formula contains both vitamin D and iron, but supplementation still depends on the child’s diet and exposure to sunlight.

Key takeaways:

• Iron is usually not needed if the baby is predominantly formula-fed.

• Vitamin D supplementation varies:

  • Indian guidelines recommend it even for formula-fed babies.

  • American Academy of Pediatrics suggests supplementing if the baby consumes less than 30 oz of formula per day.

• Realistically, due to limited sun exposure and air pollution, many Indian children struggle to synthesize enough vitamin D naturally—even if they’re outdoors.

Dr. Sivaranjani suggests:
Don’t assume your child’s needs are met just because they’re on formula. Discuss your baby’s overall intake, sun exposure, and diet with your pediatrician to decide whether supplements are needed.

The One Supplement Every Child Needs

Dr. Sivaranjani emphasizes that Vitamin D is essential—not optional—for most children, especially in urban environments. Despite living in a sunny country like India, factors like air pollution, indoor lifestyles, and limited outdoor playtime severely impact our ability to naturally absorb this vital nutrient.

☀️ Why Vitamin D Is Crucial:

• Bone health: It helps the body absorb calcium, building strong bones and teeth.

• Immunity: Plays a key role in keeping infections at bay.

• Sleep & mood regulation: Linked to better sleep patterns and emotional well-being.

• Skin, hair & eye health: Supports overall development.

⚠️ A Word of Caution:

Dr. Sivaranjani warns against giving high-dose vitamin D (like the popular 60,000 IU sachets) without a blood test:

• Too much vitamin D can be toxic.

• Over-supplementation may lead to neurological and cardiac issues.

👩‍⚕️ Her Advice:

• Babies under 1 year: 400 IU/day

• Toddlers & kids: 600 IU/day

• Only increase dosage if a deficiency is confirmed via blood test

Does Your Child Need Iron Supplements?

Iron deficiency is common among toddlers and adolescents, and it can affect everything from mood to appetite.

Watch for signs of iron deficiency:

• Pale skin

• Irritability and tantrums

• Hair thinning or brittleness

• Craving non-food items like chalk or mud

• Low appetite

Dr. Sivaranjani recommends:

• Testing hemoglobin and iron profile before supplementing.

• Using vitamin C-rich foods to enhance iron absorption.

• Avoid giving iron alongside calcium (they interfere with each other).

Is Vitamin Deficiency Related to Picky Eating?

Surprisingly, yes. Nutritional deficiencies can cause picky eating, not just result from it.

Dr. Sivaranjani explains:

• Iron deficiency often leads to low appetite.

• Constipation is another common cause of reduced interest in food.

• Parental pressure and poor mealtime habits also contribute.

• Trust your child’s hunger cues—“No child starves themselves.”

Can Kids Get Enough Calcium Without Milk?

Milk is not the only source of calcium! For kids who reject milk, a balanced diet can do the job.

Calcium-rich alternatives include:

• Curd (yogurt)

• Eggs

• Ragi (though absorption is limited)

• Almonds, leafy greens, tofu, chia seeds, sesame, soya

Dr. Sivaranjani advises:

• Avoid calcium supplements unless medically necessary.

• A bit of extra effort with food planning goes a long way.

Best Form of Supplementation for Kids

With so many options on the market—gummies, syrups, chewables—parents often feel confused about which supplement form is best for their child. Dr. Sivaranjani breaks it down simply: safety and effectiveness come first.

🚫 Gummies? A Hard No

• Choking hazard

• Sugar promotes tooth decay

• High risk of overdose (they taste like candy!)

✅ What to Choose Instead:

• For children under 5–6 years:
  👉 Syrup formulations are safest and easiest to dose.

• For older kids (5+ years):
  👉 Chewable tablets can be introduced, but should be supervised.

🪥 Pro tip:

Always rinse your child’s mouth after giving any supplement, especially syrups, to prevent tooth decay.

Why Your Kids Do Not Need Milk Mixes

This one is a big myth-buster. Milk mixes marketed as health boosters are often unnecessary and even harmful.

Dr. Sivaranjani warns:

• Most milk mixes are full of sugar or jaggery, misleadingly labeled “natural.”

• They can cause:

  • Dental issues

  • Overeating

  • Gut issues

  • Future risks like PCOS and early puberty

• These mixes mask the real issue—poor diet or appetite.

🧠 Misleading Marketing Tactics:

• “Natural ingredients” don’t mean the product is healthy.

• “Sugar-free” often includes jaggery, which is still sugar.

• “Double protein” claims are meaningless if your child is already getting enough from food.

Instead, she recommends:

• Address nutritional gaps directly (e.g., with a simple multivitamin syrup).

• Offer a variety of real foods—fruits, vegetables, nuts, grains.

• Teach children to enjoy food, not rely on flavored milk for nutrition.

The Precautions to Take When Giving ORS

When your child has diarrhea or vomiting, you may be tempted to grab a colorful bottle labeled “ORS.” Be careful—it might not be what it seems.

Dr. Sivaranjani strongly recommends:

• Use WHO-recommended ORS sachets only:

  • 4.1g sachet in 200ml water

  • 20.5g sachet in 1L water

• Liquids you can give (Besides ORS)

  • Fresh soups (vegetable or chicken)

  • Starch water (rice water)

  • Dal water

  • Fresh buttermilk (make sure it’s not sour)

  • Mature coconut water (lower osmolarity and gentle on the stomach)

• Avoid fruit juices, sugary drinks, flavored powders, and fake ORS products.

• Homemade ORS: 1 pinch salt + 1 tsp sugar in 200ml water.

• During vomiting:

  • Wait 30–60 minutes before rehydrating.

  • Offer small sips every 5–10 minutes.

• Don’t rush with solids. Hydration is the priority.

• Continue breastfeeding during diarrhea.

🕒 What to Do During Vomiting:

• Don’t rush to feed your child right after vomiting.

• Let them rest for 30–60 minutes, then offer sips of liquids every 5–10 minutes.

• If the vomiting continues or becomes frequent, seek medical help promptly.

• Even if the child doesn’t eat solids for 24–48 hours, hydration is the priority.

Dr. Sivaranjani reminds parents:
Misinformation around ORS and electrolyte drinks can be dangerous. Always read labels carefully, avoid colorful flavored alternatives, and when in doubt, stick to plain, proven solutions—or consult your pediatrician.

Final Thoughts:

This episode is a must-listen for every parent navigating the confusing world of kids’ nutrition. Dr. Sivaranjani’s advice is rooted in science, not fear. Whether it’s resisting unnecessary supplements or decoding misleading marketing, the key is to stay informed, ask questions, and trust your gut as a parent.

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Screens are everywhere, from high chairs to bedtime routines, and for many modern parents, managing screen time has become one of the most frustrating and confusing parts of raising young children. In this episode of The Modern Indian Parent Podcast, host Rinni Gupta sits down with Dr. Madhumita Ezal, a screen-time reduction expert and PhD in consumer psychology, to unpack the science, the risks, and the real-life impact of excessive screen exposure in kids. Known widely on Instagram as @screenfreeparent, Dr. Madhu shares insights from her research, the darker side of “educational” content, the rise of virtual autism, and how families can regain balance without turning parenting into a battleground. Whether you’re dealing with tantrums, navigating grandparents, or simply wondering how much screen time is too much—this episode offers the clarity and compassion you’ve been looking for.

Dr. Madhumita’s Journey into Screen Time Reduction

Dr. Madhumita began her career helping brands increase screen time. Her PhD focused on getting adults to scroll and shop more online. But after reading about the manipulative tactics used in children’s content, she shifted gears entirely—choosing instead to help families reduce digital exposure.

Her journey in a nutshell:

• PhD focus: maximizing adult time online for e-commerce.

• Realization: similar manipulative research being used to hook children.

• Trigger: a New York Times article about Cocomelon’s frame-by-frame edits to hold attention.

• Response: began breaking down research into simple reels for parents.

• Outcome: viral content, growing demand, and the launch of her full-time screen-free parenting course.

Recommended Screen Time for Babies and Toddlers

Dr. Madhumita clearly outlines the internationally agreed screen time guidelines for young children. She emphasizes that quality matters more than quantity, and warns against over-focusing on “just one hour” without considering what is being shown.

Guidelines shared:

• Under 2 years: No screen time, except for video calls.

• 18–24 months: Begin with small doses (~30 mins) of high-quality content.

• 2 to 5 years: Max 1 hour per day of high-quality programming.

• Post age 5: No strict time limit, but prioritize sleep, outdoor play, meals, and family time.

What Excessive Screen Time Does to a Child’s Brain

What happens when a child is given unlimited access to YouTube shorts or fast-paced content? Their developing brain is overwhelmed by stimulation and real life begins to feel dull in comparison.

Dr.Madhumita explains:

• Shows like Cocomelon use rapid cuts and sound effects to keep kids hooked.

• Real-life activities pale in comparison to overstimulating content.

• Excessive screen time creates a dopamine surge followed by a crash.

• Children’s tantrums post-screen are neurological, not behavioral.

• The brain begins to crave more stimulation, not out of defiance but addiction.

Dopamine, Addiction, and the Science Behind Screen Cravings

Dr. Madhumita explains the neurological mechanics behind why screens are so addictive. Like sugar or drugs, screen content gives the brain a powerful dopamine hit, especially in young children.

Dopamine facts from the episode:

• Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that pushes us to seek pleasure and reward.

• Historically tied to survival (e.g., food, rest), now hijacked by screens.

• Kids can’t rationalize or self-regulate the way adults can.

• Tantrums after removing screens are like withdrawal symptoms—not manipulation.

Are Educational Shows Like Miss Rachel Actually Beneficial?

While many parents credit shows like Miss Rachel for teaching their kids language or numbers, Dr. Madhumita cautions against over-reliance. Learning only happens when an adult is actively involved.

Important distinctions:

• Children under 3 have a “video deficit”—they don’t learn as well from recorded content.

• Video calls are the only recommended screen activity under age 2, due to real-time interaction.

• Learning improves when parents co-watch and participate.

• Shows can teach parents how to talk to their kids, but the parent must be the one engaging.

Understanding Virtual Autism and Its Impact

“Virtual autism” refers to autism-like symptoms in kids exposed to high levels of screen time before age 3. Though not a formal diagnosis, Dr. Madhumita shares how these symptoms can often be reversed when screens are removed.

Key insights:

• Caused by >3 hours/day of screen time in toddlers.

• Common symptoms: speech delay, poor eye contact, no name response.

• Real autism is neurological and not caused by screens.

• Virtual autism is reversible; real autism is not.

• Recovery is possible in 2 months to 1 year with screen detox.

Early Warning Signs of Screen Overuse in Kids

One of the most surprising patterns Dr. Madhumita Ezal sees in her work is that many cases of excessive screen use and virtual autism come from joint family homes. It seems counterintuitive—wouldn’t having grandparents around mean more active engagement and less screen dependency? But the reality is quite the opposite. Many older caregivers, now in their 60s, 70s, or 80s, simply don’t have the physical energy or capacity to match the needs of an active toddler. With their own health limitations and screen habits (think endless WhatsApp forwards and YouTube shorts), it becomes easier to hand the child a device than chase after them all day.

In many cases, both parents are working, and the child is left in the care of elders who, out of love and convenience, turn to screens as babysitters. On the surface, the child seems well-fed, rested, and safe but internally, neurological development may be silently disrupted. Indian family dynamics also play a role: it’s often considered disrespectful to question elders or interfere in how they choose to care for the child. This silence, unfortunately, contributes to a cycle of unintentional harm.

Early red flags to watch out for include:

• No eye contact.

• Delayed speech or reduced babbling.

• Child constantly asking for screens.

• Loss of interest in play or people.

• Screen use to eat, sleep, or stay calm.

How to Talk to Grandparents About Reducing Screen Time

In many cases, screen overuse begins in joint families where grandparents use devices to manage active toddlers. Dr. Madhumita shares how to communicate with elders without starting a family conflict.

Her suggestions:

• Be willing to be labeled the “fussy” or “overprotective” parent.

• Involve a doctor—grandparents often listen more to professionals.

• Help elders with low-effort activities: sensory bins, frozen toys, indoor gardening.

• Consider daycares or hiring a caregiver for active toddlers.

• Include kids in grandparents’ routines (yoga class, cooking, etc.).

When Parents Struggle to Say No to Screens

Parents often cave into tantrums because screen removal triggers extreme emotional responses. Dr. Madhumita shares what to expect and how to respond.

Her approach:

• Expect tantrums—they’re normal and temporary.

• Hold your boundary; do not give in during meltdowns.

• The first 3–7 days are the hardest; then it gets easier.

• Don’t distract from emotion—ride the wave with your child.

• Offer support, not lectures. Use calming strategies after the tantrum peaks.

Managing Your Own Screen Habits as an Adult

Children imitate adult behavior. Dr. Madhu stresses that reducing your screen time is critical if you want to reduce theirs.

Her personal tactics:

• Use greyscale mode on your phone as it makes scrolling less appealing.

• Narrate your phone usage aloud to stay accountable in front of your child.

• Use rubber bands or tape as a physical barrier on your screen.

• Set phone-free zones (bedroom, dining table) and phone-free times (before bedtime).

• Make your phone less “easy to use” to break the habit loop.

Is It Safe to Share Your Child’s Images on Social Media?

Dr. Madhu’s stance on “sharenting” is clear: kids cannot consent, and posting their photos can have long-term consequences. From online predators to identity theft, the risks are real.

Her reasons:

• Children’s tantrums or private moments should not be broadcast.

• Influencers often benefit financially, but children bear the exposure.

• Predatory comments have been found on videos of infants as young as 6 months.

• AI can now predict what a child will look like in 10–20 years.

• Sharing birthdates, school names, or routines compromises safety.

Final Thoughts and How to Reach Dr. Madhumita

As the conversation draws to a close, Dr. Madhumita leaves parents with both hope and a strong call to action: it’s never too late to make a change. Whether you’re struggling with tantrums, dealing with grandparents, or trying to reset your own digital habits, taking the first step toward mindful screen use can make a profound difference. Her courses and content offer practical, research-backed strategies for parents of children aged 0–7. If you'd like to learn more or get support directly from her, you can reach out via Instagram at @screenfreeparent, where she’s highly responsive and regularly shares free tips, insights, and tools to help families build healthier screen relationships.

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As parents, we often navigate a maze of questions about our child’s development—Are they growing well? Are they hitting their milestones? Is this behavior normal or something to be concerned about? One powerful, yet often misunderstood, support system available to families is occupational therapy (OT). Despite its proven benefits, OT still carries a sense of stigma and confusion, especially in India where therapy can feel like a last resort.

In this enlightening episode of The Modern Indian Parent Podcast, host Sanchita Daswani sits down with Dr. Mahek Uttamchandani, a leading pediatric occupational therapist and director at Stepping Stones PTC, Mumbai. With over 20 years of experience, Dr. Mahek breaks down what occupational therapy really is, when it’s needed, how it can help children thrive, from newborns with reflux to school-goers struggling with focus, emotional regulation, or daily routines.

Dr. Mahek’s Journey into Occupational Therapy

Dr. Mahek began by explaining that occupational therapy is a branch of healthcare aimed at helping individuals gain independence in their daily occupations. In India, it is studied in medical colleges and treated as a primary healthcare profession, unlike in the West where it can be pursued even after studying arts or other subjects. For children, their daily occupations are to grow, play, and learn and when there's dysfunction in any of these areas, occupational therapy can help bridge the gap.

She shared that when exploring healthcare career options, she knew she didn’t want to become a physician or surgeon. Occupational therapy appealed to her because it allowed her to combine her passion for medicine and science with creativity and playfulness. Pediatric OT, in particular, stood out due to the critical role early childhood plays in lifelong development. She emphasized that early intervention can prevent more complex issues from emerging in adolescence or adulthood.

With nearly two decades of experience, Dr. Mahek has worked across various clinics and trained in the US and UK. She currently runs Stepping Stones PTC in Mumbai and is also empaneled with neonatal units at Reliance Foundation Hospital and SRCC Children’s Hospital.

Why Is There a Stigma Around Occupational Therapy?

Dr. Mahek explains that in India, therapy is often seen through a lens of fear or shame.

• Many parents view their child as an extension of themselves, making it difficult to accept any perceived flaws.

• The Western idea of promoting independence contrasts with India’s family support system where others “do things” for the child.

• Awareness is increasing, especially in IB and international schools.

What Is Occupational Therapy?

Occupational therapy helps individuals become independent in their daily lives. For children, their primary “occupations” are playing, learning, and growing.

• Dr. Mahek defines it as a health profession that improves functional independence.

• OT addresses issues like trouble with brushing teeth, writing, eating, or socializing.

When Should a Parent Consider Occupational Therapy?

You don’t need to wait for a crisis.

• Dr. Mahek recommends getting an assessment if you notice even mild delays.

• OT requires a valid therapeutic goal, so there must be a real dysfunction.

• Life skills like swimming or gymnastics may suffice if no dysfunction is found.

What Are Some Signs to Look Out for That a Kid Needs Therapy?

Dr. Mahek advises watching for delays that disrupt daily function.

• Diagnoses like autism, ADHD, or cerebral palsy

• Difficulty with daily routines—eating, bathing, handwriting

• Increasing referrals for emotional and social regulation concerns

The Rise of Specialists in Child Care

Dr. Mahek explains that the noticeable rise in child-focused specialists today like occupational therapists, child nutritionists, and sleep consultants is not necessarily because more children are facing problems, but because modern parents are more informed and proactive. Earlier generations may have overlooked or normalized many challenges that today’s parents choose to explore and address. With greater access to research and resources, today’s parents are asking deeper questions and are more willing to adapt their parenting styles to better support their child’s overall development. She also points out that modern lifestyles, changing family structures, and new scientific findings about emotional development and childhood experiences have all contributed to this shift.

Key reasons behind the rise of specialists in child care:

• Parents today are more aware and ask more questions about their child’s development.

• There is a greater willingness to explore newer, more emotionally supportive parenting methods.

• Scientific research has highlighted the long-term impact of poor emotional environments in early childhood.

• There is increasing recognition of the role emotional well-being plays in shaping future health and behavior.

• Modern nuclear families and busy work lives mean parents may need more external support in child-rearing.

Occupational Therapy for Newborns: Reflux and Colic

OT can benefit even newborns, particularly for feeding and digestion.

• Dr. Mahek assesses latch quality and feeding posture.

• She recommends upright or left-lateral positioning for reflux.

• Educates parents on responsive caregiving—recognizing cues for hunger and satiety.

Defining Sensory Processing Disorders

Dr. Mahek describes sensory processing as a natural neurological process that takes place in all of us—it’s how our brain receives, filters, and responds to sensory information from our environment. When this system doesn’t work efficiently, a child may become either overly sensitive or under-responsive to stimuli like touch, sound, movement, or taste. This can affect their ability to play, eat, interact, or feel safe. She notes that while awareness about sensory processing disorders has increased only in recent decades, lifestyle shifts like less outdoor play and more screen time may also be contributing to a genuine rise in such difficulties among children today.

Common signs and contributing factors of sensory processing disorders:

• Children may refuse to touch certain foods or textures, or avoid messy play (signs of tactile sensitivity).

• Everyday tasks like brushing hair, getting a haircut, or wearing certain clothes may cause distress.

• Sensory overload may affect focus, social interactions, and learning.

• Increased screen exposure and reduced free, unstructured play can interfere with healthy sensory development.

• Many children who were considered "colicky" or "fussy" babies are later found to have underlying sensory issues.

She emphasizes the importance of distinguishing between mild dislikes and actual dysfunction. If a child refuses to wear their school uniform because of its texture, or takes three hours to finish a meal due to aversions, it goes beyond preference as it disrupts daily life. That’s when parents should consider occupational therapy. Dr. Mahek cautions against rushing into therapy just because it's trending in parent circles. Instead, parents should look for clear signs that the child’s quality of life is being impacted.

Helping Kids Struggling at Mealtimes

Children with tactile sensitivities may reject foods and textures.

Dr. Mahek recommends:

• Avoiding “desensitization” and instead using heavy muscle and deep pressure activities (e.g., pushing/pulling)

• Introducing food play to build familiarity and comfort

• Respecting the child’s response and being patient rather than forceful

The Difference Between Toddler Tantrums and Actual Struggles

How can you tell if it’s just a tantrum or a deeper issue?

• Dr. Mahek suggests looking for a cluster of signs, not just one.

• If hair washing, brushing, clothing tags, and food textures all cause distress, it's more than a phase.

• Trial adaptations (like using a bath visor) can help rule out simple dislikes.

How to Help Kids That Can’t Focus

Dr. Mahek addresses a growing concern among parents today—children who struggle to focus, especially during tasks like writing, reading, or structured activities. While it’s often said that “kids are just being kids,” she points out that attention span does follow developmental expectations. A useful guideline she shares is: a child’s age plus two minutes equals their expected attention span. So, a four-year-old should be able to focus for about six minutes.

She explains that reduced focus in children today is often linked to changes in lifestyle. Many children have less opportunity for free play, are overscheduled with classes, and are increasingly exposed to screens, even in educational settings. All of this impacts the child’s ability to regulate their body and mind. However, Dr. Mahek urges parents to observe whether the focus issues are across all areas (home, school, play), or if it’s limited to tasks the child simply doesn’t enjoy because sometimes, it’s not about attention, it’s about interest.

She recommends an assessment if attention challenges are consistent and begin affecting learning, social engagement, or daily tasks.

Key insights and suggestions from Dr. Mahek:

• A child’s attention span can be roughly calculated as age + 2 minutes.

• Reduced unstructured play, screen exposure, and overscheduling can disrupt attention regulation.

• Lack of focus across various settings (not just one) may indicate a deeper issue worth exploring.

• Children may appear distracted not because they can't focus, but because they lack the skills needed for the task (e.g., perceptual or motor skills).

• Misalignment between a child’s temperament and the kind of extracurriculars or learning activities they’re placed in can worsen focus issues.

• Activities involving movement and sensory input (like outdoor play, climbing, or sports) help regulate attention naturally.

• When attention challenges consistently interfere with functioning, it’s time to consult an occupational therapist for a deeper assessment.

Understanding Shyness and Social Skills

When is shyness just a personality trait, and when is it a concern?

• Dr. Mahek emphasizes looking at attachment and emotional safety.

• A child might be shy by nature, but if it affects friendships, school participation, or leads to bullying, it's time to investigate.

• She recommends evaluating parent-child dynamics, social-emotional skills, and sensory issues.

The Process of Occupational Therapy Assessment

Dr. Mahek outlines a structured and personalized approach to therapy. The evaluation typically unfolds in three parts:

• Parent Interview: The first step is a detailed conversation with the parents. Dr. Mahek gathers insights starting from the pregnancy and birth history to the child’s developmental milestones and current concerns. This helps establish context and understand the child’s journey from a caregiver’s perspective.

• Unstructured Observation: Next, the child is observed through play-based interaction. Since play is the child’s primary occupation, this method helps evaluate how the child moves, responds, engages, and regulates themselves in a natural setting. The observation is informal, but guided by key developmental and sensory parameters.

• Objective Testing: The final part involves standardized assessments, which are evidence-based tools that provide quantifiable data. Tests like the SPM, SIFTT, and others may be used to assess sensory processing, handwriting, motor coordination, and behavioral patterns. These remove subjectivity and confirm whether the observed concerns align with validated clinical markers.

Once all three parts are complete, Dr. Mahek and her team compile the findings to define therapeutic goals and choose the most appropriate intervention methods.

• Testing tools like SIFT and SOSI are used to validate findings.

• Therapy is play-based, individualized, and uses evidence-backed approaches like:

  • Sensory Integration

  • Neurodevelopmental Therapy

  • The Solihull Approach (for understanding behavior)

Dr. Mahek advises that duration varies per child—it can be short or long-term based on how quickly the dysfunction turns into function.

Conclusion

Occupational therapy isn’t just for major concerns. It’s a deeply supportive practice that can help your child feel seen, safe, and empowered in their everyday life.

To get more real-life insights and practical tips on peaceful mealtimes, social development, or sensory challenges, listen to the full episode of the Modern Indian Parent Podcast with Dr. Mahek Uttamchandani.

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Through her candid insights and lived experience, Vishruti shares not just why she chose this path, but how she built a life around it with intention, courage, and incredible clarity.

Introduction: Rinie on Why Unschooling Matters

Rinie opens with a question many parents quietly wonder: Is the school system really serving our children? The episode reflects a growing realization that rote learning and one-size-fits-all education can dim a child’s natural curiosity.

Vishruti’s son, who has never stepped into a school, is already building robots and reading hundreds of books by the age of nine. She joins the conversation to explain how unschooling supports a child’s natural abilities and why it may be a better path for some families.

Meet Vishruti Shah: Conscious Parenting Coach and Unschooling Mama of 2

Vishruti introduces herself as someone who was once fully immersed in the academic rat race, topping national entrance exams and studying architecture at one of Asia’s best colleges. But despite her success, she found herself more drawn to the spontaneity and creativity of radio.

“No one taught me radio, yet I thrived. That’s when I realised—learning doesn’t only happen in classrooms.”

This awakening shaped how she would eventually parent: giving her children space to discover their own voice instead of pushing them through the same system.

Why She Never Considered Traditional Schooling

For Vishruti, choosing not to send her children to traditional school wasn't a rebellious act—it was a deeply conscious and intuitive decision rooted in her own life journey. Having grown up as a top-performing student in a highly academic environment, she followed the “ideal” path: good grades, prestigious college, a promising career in architecture. But when she unexpectedly discovered her love for radio, everything shifted.

This revelation made her question the very foundation of our schooling system. If learning could happen so naturally when driven by passion, why was school designed to suppress that?

From the moment she became a mother, Vishruti found herself wondering how to raise a child who could stay connected to their inner voice who wouldn’t be conditioned to chase external validation or fit into predefined molds.

She shares:

• Traditional schooling often prioritizes conformity over self-awareness.

• The system focuses on knowledge acquisition, not self-discovery.

• Children are subjected to competition and pressure before they’re emotionally equipped to handle it.

She viewed unschooling not just as an educational philosophy, but as a way to support her children in truly knowing themselves.

“For me, it’s not about education—it’s about life.”

Unschooling vs. Homeschooling: What’s the Difference?

Vishruti explains that homeschooling often mimics school at home, with parents replacing teachers and following curriculums. Unschooling, on the other hand, is:

• Child-led and interest-based

• Flexible, yet intentional

• Built around the idea of responsibility, not just freedom

In unschooling, the child chooses what, how, when, and from whom they want to learn. The parent’s role is to support, not dictate.

Getting Other Families Onboard for Unschooling

When Vishruti shared her decision with family, she met resistance. But she approached it with empathy and patience. She slowly shared what she had seen in her research, visiting over 200 unschooling families, meeting kids who had never stepped into a classroom, yet were thriving. But what truly shifted opinions wasn’t the data or the travel. It was watching her son.

When her family began seeing how curious, articulate, emotionally aware, and confident her son was becoming, the questions slowly faded.

Vishruti recommends:

• Listening with empathy: Acknowledge where your family’s fears are coming from. Their concern often comes from love.

• Offering exposure: Share stories, articles, and examples of successful unschooled children.

• Letting the child lead the proof: The biggest transformation happens when people witness the child blooming without pressure or comparison.

Over time, it wasn’t Vishruti’s words that shifted mindsets- it was her child’s joy, curiosity, and clarity that made others believe.

A Day in the Life: What Unschooling Looks Like

Every day looks different, but the rhythm is built around awareness, autonomy, and connection.

When her son was younger:

• Daily outdoor time (4–7 PM)

• Visits to shops, parks, and people’s workplaces

• Constant exposure to different real-world experiences

As he’s grown older:

• He plans his own week

• Practices music, reading, writing, and sports

• Family time is used for reflection and discussion

“We live by planning, doing, and reflecting. It’s not a system, it’s a flow.”

Why Children Don’t Need Teachers or Fancy Resources for Learning

Vishruti shares a perspective that turns conventional ideas about learning on their head: children don’t need structured teaching or expensive educational tools to learn. In her experience, learning unfolds naturally when children are given the freedom to explore the world on their terms.

She shares how:

• Her toddler teaches her joy through laughter and presence.

• Her son learned reading and math through life, not textbooks.

• Over-instruction kills curiosity. Children are born learners.

Instead of taking on the role of a teacher, Vishruti chooses to be a facilitator. She supports her son by responding to his interests, researching alongside him, and offering suggestions or connections when needed. She brings in tools and books only if they genuinely support his curiosity, not as a starting point, but as a response to it. Real learning, she feels, doesn’t come from structured lessons, but from living with presence, play, and purpose.

How She Built a Home Full of Learning Resources

In the early days, Vishruti invested heavily in resources:

• Thousands of books, often imported

• Hands-on toys and tools for exploration

• Real-world experiences through travel and visits

“Books were my diamonds. I had a separate monthly budget just for them.”

She also focused on curating a safe, emotionally rich environment:

• Conscious use of space

• Thoughtful choice of what enters the home

• Avoiding over-scheduling or overstimulation

Future Prospects of Open Learners: University & Careers

Vishruti has already met unschooled teens who:

• Work with government agencies at age 17

• Run businesses by 19

• Are confident, self-driven, and capable

If her child wants to pursue university, he can take the NIOS board exams. If not, he can build a portfolio and gain experience through internships.

“We don’t know what the world will look like in 2040. Why are we trying to control it?”

She emphasizes that the goal is not a specific outcome but a self-aware individual who knows how to adapt, learn, and lead.

Where to Begin: Practical Advice for New Unschoolers

If you’re new to the idea of unschooling, Vishruti suggests starting with two simple shifts:

1. Spend Agenda-Free Time With Your Child
   No phonics practice. No worksheets. Just connection.

2. Meet Other Unschooling Families
   Exposure reduces fear. Seeing this life in action builds trust.

She also warns against copying anyone’s method including hers. The goal is not to replace one rigid system with another.

Finding Your Unschooling Community

Back when she started, Vishruti traveled across the country to meet 200+ unschooling families. Today, social media makes this easier.

She recommends:

• Following unschoolers on Instagram

• Reaching out via email or DMs

• Attending workshops and retreats

• Joining community platforms like ROH (Rethinking Our Homeschool)

Vishruti is working on creating more accessible resources to help families find each other and learn from a variety of approaches, not just hers.

Final Thoughts and How to Reach Vishruti

Rinie reflects on how liberating and healing Vishruti’s journey has been, not just for her child, but for herself as a parent.

To connect with Vishruti:

• Instagram: @vishruti.shah

• Email: team.vishruti@gmail.com

She continues to mentor families through her courses, workshops, and growing community initiatives, driven by a single dream:

“One unschooling community in every city of the world.”

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